WWE
The Crossface: Royal Rumble Predictions
By The Smart Marks
Jan 18, 2003, 20:46

This Sunday, WWE holds one of the Big 5 PPV's, the Royal Rumble. Two world titles, a Rumble victory, a tag title, a Rumble slot and the first ever stepdaughter vs. stepmother match will all take place. The Smart Marks discuss the PPV and this past week's RAW X special. Before we get started, let's meet the players...

Brandon Truitt: Brandon is a regular here on the Crossface and happens to own a heaping helping of shoot interviews. Check out his recap of the Bobby Eaton Shoot Interview. He will be moderating the discussion.

Bryan "bps21" Staebell: The self-proclaimed #1 NWA:TNA mark,Bryan prepares the Smart Marks for Total Nonstop Action with his NWA:TNA previews. Check out his last preview here!

Byron Vester: Catch Byron when he drops in with the news. When the wrestling world really pisses him off, he'll drop in with his Anger Management column. If you want to know why he is always pissed off, THIS is your destination.

Damian �The Dames: � Gonzalez: Dames keeps busy every week with the NWA:TNA recaps and whatever else he feels like chipping in with. Check out his latest piece of art as he recaps NWA:TNA Week 27. Also, make sure you look for his Diatribe on the Royal Rumble PPV!

Dr. Tom: Tom brings the content every week, providing the reader with his Smackdown recaps, The Mid-Week News, movie reviews and much more! Read up on Tom's feelings on this week's Smackdown!

Mark Goodhart: Mark drops in every once in a while with his Mark's Marks tape reviews. His Moving Right Along columns, examine the world of wrestling moves and the psychology involved in using them. Check out his latest Moving Right Along column.

O.R. Polk, Jr.: Polk is a regular in the Crossface and has a knack for giving detailed, entertaining DVD reviews� without giving away the movie! Don�t forget to read his latest DVD review, Hookers at the Point!

Patrick Spoon: While he doesn't recap Tough Enough 3 for the site anymore, Spoon will still drop in with commentary from his twisted mind. He'll also chime in with his love of Kylie Minogue and other pop culture phenomenons. Don't forget to read his last recap of Tough Enough Week Seven.

Peter Kostka: The Smart Marks welcome of the newest members of the staff to the Crossface. Peter picks up where Spoon left off, recapping this season's Tougn Enough. He'll also chime in with tape reviews and commentary. Check out his latest work, Tough Enough III Recap: Weeks 12 + 13.



Brandon: OK... let's start with the Rumble predictions. First match on the card is Triple H vs. Scott Steiner
Peter: Wait, they're actually going to WRESTLE? You sure it isn't a squat contest or something?
Byron: Well, provided that they don't lose their inhibitions and start fucking each other in the ring, I'd give the nod to Triple H as the Push From Hell continues.
Polk: I'll be really surprised if both contestants make it through the entire match uninjured. It's quite obvious neither can work given they've had every non-physical confrontation in the 80's booking manual.
Dr. Tom: Yawn. Snore. Oh, is there a match going on? Snore. That would be my reaction if I were stupid enough to pay $35 for this show. HHH retains, and if Steiner does get a win, it'll be via DQ.
Patrick: Triple H wins, not only because of the WWE law of "the last laugh," saying that whoever gets the last hits in on the last TV show before the Pay Per View loses at the show, but because he's let himself look vulnerable. The match itself will be decent, but nothing that will impress or interest us.
Dr. Tom: Decent? Two roided-up cripples who can't work, one who can't go more than five minutes, and it'll be decent? Spoon, you're a very generous soul.
Dames: I have a feeling that HHH will retain, but I have a small semblance of doubt simply because there really isn't anything for HHH or Steiner to move onto after this match.
Bryan: Until someone proves otherwise, no mortal man can defeat HHH. It's not going to be pretty. I suppose Steiner could win if the plan is for HHH to win it right back at WrestleMania or something. The title is like a yo-yo to him.
Mark: They'll spend a lot of time battling over basic holds like in the Warrior-Hogan match from Wrestlemania 6... but it won't be any good.
Peter: Man, if you are thinking Steiner will win, then you haven't been paying attention to the WWE. HHH wins naturally with a Pedigree out of nowhere. If they give this thing more than 10 minutes, prepare for the "boring" chants. Hell, even 8 minutes is too long.
Patrick: Hey, I'm easily entertained. There will be stalls aplenty, but the crowd will get into it hopefully. I give it 10-15 minutes, with Flair interference.
Dames: Do you REALLY think these guys are going to get 20 minutes? : Even if it were scheduled to last that long, I think it would get cut short midway.
Byron: No way, Dames. With all the money invested in Steiner, Vince would have to be a fucking fool to make him go 20 minutes and severely expose himself
If we're lucky enough, maybe Hunter will run in terror from Steiner's biceps again like during the pose down.
Bryan: I think they will go at least 15 minutes. That's a requirement of working the main event style.
Dr. Tom: I think Steiner's heart will explode at the fifteen-minute mark.
Polk: The fans are already tired of Steiner simply because he's been in WWE a month and he hasn't really had a match. How do you get behind someone without knowing what he can do?
Brandon: Triple H's knee is supposedly still messed up from last month. On top of that, Steiner's breaking down. What's the chance of a career-ending injury in this match?
Mark: Slim to none, Brandon. these guys aren't going to be doing above a belly-to-belly suplex. Don't worry about the injuries. Triple H will still pull out the win though and free him up for the Austin return. And yeah, they'll get plenty of time to do a whole lot of nothing.
Dr. Tom: I think they should have an Iron Man match, with a twist. The first guy to tear a quad or get a significant steroid-influenced injury loses.
Dames: Well, with a short Rumble match this year, the minutes are going to have to be made up somewhere. With Vince's logic, he'll give the extra time to them.
Patrick: I think there's a low chance of a career-ending injury, because they won't really be going out there and doing hurricaranas and planchas or anything. At worst, I see Triple H hurting himself on the facebuster or something.
Brandon: Spoon, remember Nash tore his quad WALKING ACROSS THE RING. These guys will be doing more strenuous stuff than that.
Peter: HHH tore his quad just hitting Jericho. Steiner's arm will fall off like that zombie in the Thriller video. It�s bad enough they have been stinking up the joint on the house show circuit.
Polk: It's a shame. This match would've actually been something to watch less than three years ago. My how times change.
Byron: Unless Steiner tries the Screwdriver or the rana again, I highly doubt there'll be any serious injuries.
Patrick: Damn. Well, umm... they managed to go through Steiner's suplexes on Raw, that should be a good indicator. Right? RIGHT?

Brandon: OK, next match: Benoit vs. Angle for the Smackdown title.
Polk: Thank God for Smackdown. If there were any semblance of fairness in WWE there would only be one title and this would still be the match topping the card. As is, it's just for the Smackdown title. But this is about the only match on the card I'm looking forward to, even if Angle's win is a forgone conclusion.
Mark: Angle had better go over, doing one of the WWE's classic double changes would be a disaster heading into Wrestlemania. Angle shouldn't be laying down for anyone until Wrestlemania.
Patrick: Angle wins, with a possible screwy ending to have a rematch next month. This feud has been on and off for a few months now, and has plenty of steam left in it, I think. They'll give it 20-30 if they're smart. It had better get the final match before the Rumble spot.
Dames: I can't see Angle losing the title to Benoit at the Rumble. With everything seemingly leading up to Brock/Angle at Mania, giving Benoit a transitional title reign is actually the last thing they need. They need that title to be stable for at least 2 months before Mania...or why the big deal. Also, if Benoit ever does win the title, I wouldn't want it to be a transitional reign, but that�s just wishful thinking. Nothing else comes close in terms of match of the night.
Bryan: What about Torrie vs. Dawn?
Byron: Benoit/Angle will be good, but not as good as their other matches, but I'm kind of wavering on that thought due to the Smackdown handicap match and how well Angle looked. Oh, and Angle wins, hands down because Benoit is just cannon fodder to set-up Brock/Angle at Mania.
Dr. Tom: This is where everyone who snoozed through HHH-Steiner can wake up. I don't think Angle's knee will be a problem, though he might have to skip spots like the pop-up superplex. Again, Smackdown saves a PPV with an excellent match.
Peter: Trust these two to put on a faboo match every time. Even though Angle's knee won�t be at 100%, we should get AT LEAST a ***1/2 match and be Match of the Night.
Bryan: Angle will retain the title. Benoit has beaten him twice already and somehow took over the storyline of Brock destroying Angle's knee. Match of the night easily.
Mark: Still, they'll work in about 8 German suplexes that don't mean anything and Angle will no sell when he goes to the ankle... That's what always happens though
Dr. Tom: I think we all know Angle's going to win to set up the Mania match. It's a shame Benoit has to be the sacrificial lamb.
Peter: Angle retains due to Team Angle shenanigans after 30 minutes or so.
Byron: I don't see the match going 30 minutes, but considering the Rumble changes, I wouldn't put it past them.
Dames: Tom, Benoit comes out looking good out of this whole thing so I don't mind it. He's being viewed as a legit contender for the title for the first time in over a year
Bryan: I think it's great that Benoit is the sacrificial lamb. I'd rather watch this than all of 2002.
Dr. Tom: Personally, I'd like to see Team Angle interfere, and Edge run out to save Benoit, only to turn on him and join Team Angle. Either way, I think interference figures in this decision. ***1/2 -****
Patrick: With the Team Angle and possible Edge screwiness, it can go 30 minutes easily.
Peter: Remember, the intervals are only 1 minute this year, so there's plenty of time for them. I'll go along with Spoon. Edge needs some shaking up and his face shtick is stale.
Dames: Why would you want Edge to join Team Angle, Tom???
Dr. Tom: Dames, this would be a nice nod to continuity from the "Team ECK" days. I like Edge better as heel, Dames. As a face, he's kind of a goober who cracks wise and has a dorky grin.
Dames: But after all of the feuding that they've done, to rejoin him just like that would just be a swerve for swerves sake.
Polk: WWE has it all wrong. This is where Big Show should be in Benoit's place as the sacrifice.They say they have big plans for Benoit down the road...yeah, I'll believe it when I see it.
Mark: But then you would have to watch Big Show in a match that lasts longer than 8 minutes.

Peter: Remember Dames, this is WWE, where ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN!!!
Polk: It's a helluva lot better than Big Show as the first man to get a win over Brock Lesnar.
Byron: Personally, I think if/when they do turn Edge heel, he has to be a loner. Just throwing him in a group that's going to take away the focus from him would just be a bad idea
Patrick: But boy, he sure is a happy goober when he comes out. The fans really have taken to him. I mean, that feud with Angle did wonders for him.
Peter: But what the hell are they doing with Edge NOW?
Polk: Edge busted out "chumpstain" on Smackdown tonight. Talk about tired...and I'm sure that's Christian's word anyway. Christian was always the brains and charisma man on that team. Without Christian, Edge wouldn't have even HAD a gimmick.
Dames: Notice how he didn't even bother to mention that Christian was his "brother" in that promo
Patrick: Christian was the kazoo player of the duo...
Mark: Right, because Edge and Christian didn't have the gimmick at the same exact time or anything
Polk: Next week, we'll get footage of Edge and Christian as tag partners but Christian's face'll be blurred out.

Brandon: And now we get to the tag title match: William Regal and Lance Storm vs. the Dudley Boyz
Mark: Lord, who really cares about this match what with Lawler beating up the tag champs all the time. Watch Lance and Regal retain to let the world know that announcers are better than the workers... again.
Dames: My interest in the WWE Tag Division is at its lowest point right now
Byron: Total snoozer. Bookdust got sacrificed so Hunter's big buddy can get a title reign and bore audiences nationwide. What a fucking joke. : I really like Storm, I do...but Regal just bores me to death and the Duds are nothing new. The Dudleys will win just because they had the over team job so that they could get the titles later on
Dr. Tom: Here's another match where you can step away and pet your cat. I think Regal/Storm retain, but I really don't give a tinker's damn about either team. Regal sucks. And since he's basically the guy who gives HHH the best butt hickeys these days, I care about him even less.
Patrick: Dudleys win, in order to make it look like they had some insurmountable mountain to overcome despite McMahon himself coming out and giving them what they wanted in his first TV appearance since July. However, I wouldn't put it past them to keep the belts on Regal and Storm, with them using a brass kneepad or something.
Polk: I'm thinking the Dudleys get the duke here and The Regal Storm had no place winning the titles in the first place. Man, does Lance look sexy in them trunks or what? (Did I just say that aloud?)
Patrick: They seriously need to give those belts some stability, but really... can you tell the thunder to be quiet? Can you catch a rainbow in your hands? No, such is the WWE Tag Division.
Polk: Where are all these great matches that Regal is supposed to be busting out? I haven't heard jack shit since that match with Benoit at the Pillman show.
Dr. Tom: This is why each show having its own tag titles is a bad idea.
Peter: I don't really like either Storm or Regal, but they are 100x the team the Dudleys are. The New Old Dudleys aren't the answer. Throw BookDust in there and now we're talking. The Dudleys win in a decent bout that will most likely be the opener.
Bryan: The Dudley Boyz will win the title, something that either should have been done the night after Survivor Series or not at all. Regal and Storm are blah and the Dudleys are worse. This will be a mess of a match with good heat.
Dames: What bothers me most of all is that Booker and Goldust now have nothing going for them again.
Mark: Exactly Dames, they took an over act and buried it so guys that aren't over can get the spotlight.
Patrick: What I wouldn't give for another Goldust the Crocodile Hunter segment.
Dames: Mark, it's not like Regal and Storm are going to get over anyway...
Polk: I'd honestly send Vince my left testicle just to replay Booker T in that Scorpion King clip again.
Byron: It's pretty sad when Booker and Goldy did all that character development and got over in the process only to be treated as job boys, but that's the WWE Way, I suppose.

Brandon: Now we get to the *ahem* first Stepmother vs. Stepdaughter match ever... Dawn Marie vs. Torrie Wilson.
Mark: Torrie wins and the feud continues forever. As an aside, the Torrie delayed sell of the lamp shot tonight was hilarious.
Peter: Ugh, can we skip this one?
Brandon: I only wish...
Peter: Torrie wins, hopefully ending the ANGLE FROM HELL!!!! I just hope Al didn't "pass his genes" along, if you get my drift.
Bryan: Torrie wins a classic. I thought everyone wanted to see women's matches get storylines. This has had one. That's KIND of good right?
Dames: I'm actually going to be the optimistic one here and say this is the blowoff
Brandon: This feud has gotten more screen time than the last three months of main event feuds and it STILL won't end until Mania, I'm afraid.
Polk: Bathroom break. I don't care who wins, it doesn't matter who wins, etc, etc, etc. Who's it going to help and how's it going to benefit the winner?
Byron: Torrie/Dawn is almost on par with the necrophilia angle in its stupidity. Torrie beats Dawn in EVERYTHING they do, but this crap just keeps on coming.
Patrick: Torrie wins, because Dawn can't win. First she loses the No Mercy match, then she marries the HUNG Al Wilson, then he DIES, then she wears a horrid yet still appealing dress, and finally she loses at the Royal Rumble.
Polk: Why not put a good cruiser match on here somewhere? I like how NO ONE at the funeral bothered to break the two women up. I mean, no one would warn Torrie that Dawn was sneaking up behind her with a lamp?
Patrick: Hey, it's New Jersey. You expect compassion?
Dr. Tom: I really hope this is the blowoff, though I think the feud will do a slow simmer over a few more weeks of SD. Torrie wins, because I'm sure that easily-breakable prop lamp she got hit with tonight almost hurt.
Peter: Notice Al's hands switched postition after the coffin fell?
Mark: This was Al's best performance of his career though.
Dr. Tom: He was obviously alive at several points during the segment, Peter.
Dames: I feel bad for the guy if he's seen in airports or something. My favorite part of the segment was how Torrie was trying her DAMNDEST not to look at the camera when Dawn slapped her.
Polk: He knows what sloppy workers those two are...he had to protect himself.
Byron: Oh, and who could forget Torrie's delayed selling of the lamp? I almost died laughing.
Brandon: Mark, it was just as good as Kevin Costner in The Big Chill
Dr. Tom: The delayed sell was the best part of the segment.
Patrick: Hey, no one can forget his "stop the footage dammit" performance at Armageddon. JESUS, has this feud been going on THIS LONG??
Brandon: Yes... since Unforgiven, I think.
Dr. Tom: I could just see her thinking, "Oh my god! I so totally just got hit with a lamp! Bummer! Oh, I, like, have to sell now and stuff." ::falls over::
Peter: Torrie's facial expressions as she tried to choke up more tears was PRICELESS.
Dames: I really want to know what in the hell the bookers were thinking? Who benefits from this??? Do they honestly believe that Torrie gets some sort of rub?
Polk: You're assuming the bookers ARE thinking.
Mark: Or what they were smoking�
Brandon: They were eating rotisserie chicken.
Dames: They must have been smoking some PHAT shit.
Bryan: "Let's give more time to non-wrestlers so the talent can't get more over than me"

Brandon: And now the Foregone Conclusion match... Brock Lesnar vs. Big Show for the last spot in the Rumble.
Dames: I SAY THE BIG SHOW WINS
Patrick: BIG SHOW WINS... did you say Brock?
Mark: It's the WWE and they actually jobbed Brock to Show before.
Dames: IF any of you believed me, you're fired!
Polk: What can Brock do to Show that he hasn't done already?
Patrick: Top rope belly to belly a la Angle at King of the Ring 2000?
Byron: If Big Show wins this match, someone should be tar, feathered, and thrown to rabid tigers.
Peter: You know what? I'm picking Show here. They still have one more PPV before Wrestlemania and Show doesn't have to win the Rumble to get a WWE title shot.
Bryan: Alright...I've given it some thought and I think Brock will win. I think that Brock is one of the last guys in the Rumble later that night and Angle runs in and causes his elimination.
Dr. Tom: I think I'll go with Brock, since it seems inevitable he's going all the way. He's sure kicked Slow's ass enough; now he gets to beat him in an actual match.
Mark: But they better not do it here, this match should simply serve as an opportunity for Team Angle to mug Brock to set up a "Is Brock going to be able to complete in the Rumble" angle
Polk: Well, we've seen Brock "beat" Show before, just not get the win. But he has to do more than F-5 him; we've seen that a million times now.
Dr. Tom: I'd like to see the Shooting Brock Press.
Polk: This all leads up to....wait for it...the debut of the SHOOTING BROCK PRESS~!
Dr. Tom: Follower!
Dames: I've given up all hope on the Shooting Brock Press
Brandon: If that happens, we'll probably get another double finish to the Rumble which means both guys face their respective champions.
Patrick: I see Brock beating Show, but being too tired or distracted by Heyman's goons to win the Rumble itself.
Peter: I was thinking Steph could draw the number on Heat and have it wind up being #30. Just to put a little more drama in there.
Dames: With the Rumble being in HBK and Jericho's favor, I'm starting to feel that Brock might not actually win it.
Polk: That's something I didn't give thought to...if Brock wins the Rumble and faces the Smackdown champion, how will they go about determining who faces the RAW champ at WrestleMania?
Patrick: But no one's ever won at #30.
Brandon: what's the highest winning number, 24?
Peter: There's a first for everything. Austin won in 2001 at #27
Dr. Tom: Whoever gives HHH the best head, Polk.
Mark: They'll just say, this guy gets the shot Polk.
Bryan: The same way they always do CJ...eeni-meeni-mini-mo.
Mark: It will probably be Austin anyway
Polk: You think Austin's going to come back by WrestleMania and get a title shot?
Dr. Tom: I don't think Austin will go to Raw, though.
Mark: Seems like the writing is on the wall for it
Polk: I suppose you think he's going to go over HHH, too?
Dames: Vince is desperate enough to do it, CJ, so I wouldn't put it past him.
Mark: Austin might be one of the people to actually go over HHH cleanly.
Patrick: No way in hell. If he returns before then, he'll get a match high on the card, but not a title shot.
Peter: I don't want Austin back, especially if he knows Vince is desperate.
Brandon: Let's try it this way... outside of Brock, who has the best chance of winning it all?
Byron: Either Jericho(HA!) or HBK. Pretty much everyone else involved are nothing more than jobbers, so you might as well focus on the three former world champs.
Patrick: I picked Jericho in the forums' gambling game, and I'm sticking with it. Him and Michaels will do the 1995 thing all over again with Jericho in Bulldog's place.
Dr. Tom: Outside of Brock... I think Booker.
Polk: Who has the best chance of winning it all? Well, if he can get by Crash Holly and Headbanger Mosh, I'd say give serious consideration to Bill DeMott.
Brandon: If HBK goes to the main event of Mania, someone will REALLY have to slap some sense into Vince.
Patrick: If not Jericho, Jeff Hardy wins after Vince finds suicide note drafts in the locker room.
Bryan: I want to pick Jericho to win...actually I want to pick RVD to win...but if they have balloons and streamers tied to the rafters...I'll go with HBK again.
Peter: Jericho, maybe RVD. Hell, who knows? WWE has actually put some suspense into the Rumble at least.
Byron: Jeff Hardy winning the Rumble? Man, how fucked up would THAT be?
Brandon: About as fucked up as Jeff's weekly "face paint".
Polk: As fucked up as his latest "swanton bomb"?
Patrick: I swear, he needs to stop with the raver-ish attire and entrance and stuff. He's giving people like me a bad, er, worse name.
Dames: he's only good for a small female pop anyway these days. NO ONE gives a shit about Jeff Hardy
Dr. Tom: He needs to lay off the crack, too. Or whatever it is he's strung out on.
Peter: It's almost embarrassing to see how bad he's deteriorated since 2000.
Patrick: I watched Summerslam 2001 the other day, and he looked okay against RVD in their ladder match..
Dames: Spoon, that was probably one of the worst ladder matches I've seen
Patrick: But he took some really BAD bumps in that match, the kind that should have crippled him or broken something at least.
Dames: You'd be amazed at how many errors they can clean up on their DVD's.
Patrick: I watched my original taped Pay Per View tape. There were enough crazy spots and such to make up for whatever deficiencies there were otherwise.

Brandon: Besides the Rumble, the WWE held the now infamous RAW X show this week. Thoughts?
Mark: I'm going to bail instead. I really don't care a lick about a made up award show that doesn't mean anything.
Bryan: Ahh...RAW X. It sure was great seeing all my old favorites again. Austin in clip form...Rock via satellite...the hand...
Peter: That was an embarrassment to every wrestling fan that has stuck with them through all those 10 years. Perfect example= Trish is hot, but Sunny paved the way.
Dr. Tom: That may have been the worst show I've ever seen a wrestling company put on. And I actually watched AWA's "Team Challenge Series" back in the day.
Brandon: I've got you beat... I've watched Great American Bash 1991.
Dames: I haven't been this disappointed with a wrestling program since Starrcade 97
Byron: I wouldn't say it was the "worst" show, but dear lord was it depressing.
Polk: I was just upset that they even pretended to be celebrating or honoring 10 years of RAW history only to put on a glorified Slammy's for 2003.
Dr. Tom: What a total crock of shit show... stupid awards, winners determined by politics, awful nominees in a lot of the categories, bad footage choices, no returning stars... how much worse could they have made it?
Patrick: Like I said earlier, I only saw the first 35 minutes due to tape problems, but the rest of the results sounded horrible.
Brandon: Outside of Rock not being live via satellite, they couldn't have done much worse.
Peter: Everyone (meaning, the Superstars) looked incredibly bored throughout. The only ones paying attention seemed to be the McMahons.
Dames: It feel like a year end awards show...and a BAD one at that
Byron: The biggest slap in the face of that retched show had to be the "Best Matches" award. I mean, Christ... Austin/Kane? TLShit 4? TAKER/HARDY? What the fuck was wrong with them?
Polk: The only way it could have been worse is if Cheetum the Evil Midget came out to Stone Cold's entrance theme.
Patrick: No, Cheatum OWNED. He would have saved the show by hoisting it upon his stout and strong shoulders and carrying it to ****. Seriously, why do they have such a hard-on for the TLC match in Las Vegas?
Brandon: Because a hoss won despite sleeping through half the match, Spoon? You'd think they'd have put Austin-Taker from 1999 on there... that DID get the highest ratings of a TV match that I've ever heard of.
Dames: The Benoit/Jericho vs. Austin/HHH match could have easily won that...and 3 of the guys were there and Austin was given awards anyway, why not even NOMINATE that match?
Bryan: Actually I agree with Scott Keith's review when he said that Bulldog/Owen finals of the Euro title tourney should have won.
Polk: Just don't tell me that you're going to celebrate 10 years of history when you're really only going to remember three. When OBVIOUS nominees don't win...it's just...urgh...frustrating.
Dames: Did they cover ANYTHING from pre-97?
Peter: What about the Dallas 10-man? The crowd was ON FIRE for that one, as I recall.
Dr. Tom: Because that would make HHH cry over the memories of his torn quad, Dames. And we can't remind people that he was good once. That would clue everyone into the fact that he fucking blows now.
Dames: The Dallas 10 man wouldn't have won because half the guys in it aren't with the company anymore
Byron: True, plus it wasn't a really significant match by any means.
Brandon: Everyone from the quad match is still with the company but that didn't win either.
Dames: It didn't even get NOMINATED! That bothers me so much
Polk: And honestly, that shouldn't matter. You�re there to honor the show and the performers, not hold grudges or worry about "oh, well who's still here?" Austin/Pillman gun angle not winning really made me mad and opened my eyes.
Brandon: Austin is supposedly coming back.
Byron: I was shocked that none of the Austin/Angle matches from 2001 made it.
Bryan: At least it gave RVD a chance to address the crowd...since he was the most over person there.
Polk: Hell, what about the RVD vs. EDDY ladder match?
Patrick: Austin/Angle from late January 2002 was awesome. That was on Raw.
Dames: THE HAND WON?? One of the worst angles EVER. I guess they didn't want to give Austin another award...and since no one would have accepted upon Pillman's behalf.
Peter: At least "HHH Fucks A Corpse" wasn't nominated.
Dames: That will be in the 20th anniversary, Pete� if it gets that far.
Brandon: For whatever reason, a lot of people within the business love the Mark Henry and Mae Young stuff. It doesn't mean it's good or that the fans like it.
Dr. Tom: The hand? It insulted our intelligence enough when it first happened, then to give it an award? Asinine. Of course, they almost got booted off USA for the Pillman gun agle, but that can't win. Nope, no sir. : Obviously, WWE only wants to trade on the death of Owen Hart, and they don't care about Pillman because they can't keep reminding us what nice guys they are for dedicating a show to him.
Brandon: I don't know... Steph was practically a corpse when he "married" her in 1999 and he won for that.
Byron: That marriage angle was so crappy that it still astounds me as to how they managed to get over big-time!
Polk: I know that somewhere some WWE employee is reading on the 'net about everyone bitching about that show and saying how the smart marks will never be happy. But honestly, it's like they went out of their way to NOT make us happy with RAW X.
Dames: Actually, CJ, I hear that most of the locker room wasn't pleased with the show
Peter: WWE is "disappointed" with how the show turned out.
Dr. Tom: JR: BAH GAWD, we'll never make these damn Internet fans happy! They must be crazier than pet coons! We had many exciting matches nominated, and many fine talents giving their all to entertain our fans.
Polk: Ten years from now, they better let smarks come up with the nominees AND vote for the winners.
Brandon: Ten years from now, I doubt there will be a WWE. At this rate, I doubt it will be here in three.
Polk: But to say you're disappointed after putting a show on is...I don't know. You say you're disappointed when someone misses a cue or you have production problems. Not when you're show is a complete abortion from top to fucking bottom. Someone should've known it was gonna be a HUGE disappointment after they looked over the napkin it was on in the first place. I feel like RAW X was just a big rib on the smarks.
Peter: Seriously, Mick chose a charity hockey game over the 10th anniversary show of a program he's been a part of for at least 7 of those years. That's fucked up.
Byron: I have a theory.... somehow, Russo and Heyman killed everyone else but Steph, and wrote RAW X while high off of horse tranquilizers.


Don't forget to check back with The Smart Marks after the PPV for post-Rumble reactions. Also, look for Dames Diatribe sometime late Sunday night or early Monday morning!

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