TNA
The Royal Treatment: RAW (6.14.04)
By Peter Kostka
Jun 15, 2004, 01:15

Show ended late enough, so let�s just get to the action, shall we? I guess Johnny Nitro is no more since the picture at the beginning is just Bischoff again.

- Speaking of, Eric Bischoff has summoned Kane to his office for a chat. He had a great match against Chris Benoit last night, but unfortunately Eric has decided that there will be a new #1 contender. He knows Kane will accept that because he�s a professional, but one broken TV set later, Kane proves that he really isn�t much of a �team player.�

Pyro and music greet the live crowd in Dayton, Ohio.

Tonight: Chris Benoit, Edge and Chris Jericho face Evolution in a six-man elimination tag match.

Jim Ross is in the ring, promising footage of the Hell in a Cell match later tonight, so the people that spent $35 to see it will feel that much better. He lauds both HHH and Shawn Michaels� performances and calls them out so their asses will be closer for him to kiss. JR: �That match will live on for generations to come.� Funny, a lot of the opinions I�ve read said it was pretty pedestrian, and they didn�t even use the Cell that much. However, it�s time for both men to shake hands and move on. HBK is the first to offer, and HHH looks to take it, but Bischoff stomps out and interrupts the lovefest with an announcement about the #1 contender. But before he can do THAT, Kane arrives, and Bischoff heads for the hills. Kane stares both men down before booting Shawn out of the ring. He stalks HHH, who gives Kane a slight smirk before backing out of the ring and getting the hell out of there also. Kane follows him out, but turns his attention back to Shawn instead, booting him in the head again. He rolls him in and grabs a chair, sticking it around Shawn�s neck and Pillmanizing his throat. Blood gushes out of Shawn�s mouth as the refs and EMTs tend to him and Kane laughs maniacally as we take a break.

Thoughts: I really liked this segment for three reasons. 1) It FINALLY got rid of Shawn for a while, since him losing match after match to HHH, including the big blowoff just dropped his stock way down, and if he transitioned to another major feud right away, it would have not worked at all. Plus, it gives Shawn an instant enemy when he does come back (Summerslam would be my bet). 2) It showed the physically sadistic side of Kane, which goes with the mental games he�s been playing with Lita. The dude is just a sick man. 3) Shawn bleeding the instant Kane landed on the chair. Must have bit his tongue REALLY hard there (actually, you could see him inserting the blood pack while he was tumbling out after the first Kane boot.)

- Commercials �

Coming back, Shawn is getting slowly wheeled away to the back. Geez, the guy is bleeding like a pig and can�t breathe; think you should pick up the pace a bit? They put him into an ambulance (which slowly drives away as well. I�m never calling these guys if I get seriously hurt) as we see a replay of the attack. And here�s another break.

- Commercials �

Evil Trish and Tyson Tomko vs. Matt Hardy and Lita (Hot inter-gender action)

Matt Facts: Matt and Lita are not morning people, and they both enjoy margaritas. Well, that gimmick is officially dead. Trish grabs a headlock to start and takes Lita down, but she counters out. Trish lays in the forearms and bridges to dodge a clothesline, but Lita gets it on the rebound and delivers a headcsissors. The gents tag in and Tomko runs into a boot. Matt comes off the top with a bodypress, but Tyson catches him, but barely can keep him up as they stumble into the corner. C�mon, Matt isn�t HHH; I think Tomko could keep him up there. Tomko hits the chinlock, but Matt escapes and hits a clothesline. He goes for the Side Effect, but Tomko blocks it and goes for a powerslam, but Matt counters into a tornado DDT in a pretty nice spot. Well, that kind of made up for the previous slip. The chicks tag in, and Lita gets 2 off a legsweep. She hits an enziguri, but Tomko pulls her off the pin. Matt dumps him and follows with a plancha as Trish goes for the bulldog, but Lita pushes her off and hits the DDT for the pin at 4:30

Rating: 2.5/10

Thoughts: Tomko continues to prove he really isn�t that good and besides, RAW already has a big bodyguard type in Batista. Trish and Lita were fairly good in the ring, since Lita kept the sloppiness to a minimum. She really should learn how to punch, though.

Coming up tonight: Eugene is Chris Jericho�s guest on the Highlight Reel.

- Commercials �

- Bishoff surveys the damage to his office, and HHH arrives. He�s really concerned for Shawn, but would rather talk about the #1 contender spot, which he assumes is his. �Not quite�, says Eric. Sure, he beat Shawn last night, but there is someone on RAW who he hasn�t beaten yet, someone who is undefeated in his career. That someone is his nephew. So next week in Miami, it will be Eugene vs. HHH and if Hunter wins, he�s got his shot. HHH: �No problem.�

- The original Joe Schmo Matt Kennedy Gould is in the crowd along with the female cast of the new season of Joe Schmo. Todd Grisham gets an interview and we are subjected to a LONG plugfest for the new season premiering tomorrow night at 10. Gah, now they�ve got ME doing it. Hey, I understand that Spike wants to plug one of their top shows on their flagship show, but this took over SIX minutes, including a promo that took up five of those minutes. Seems a bit excessive to me, especially since they showed the entire first season over the weekend to hype it. I�ll watch it, of course, but let�s get on with the wrestling, please.

- Commercials - Including ANOTHER ad for JS II.

La Resistance vs. Rosey and Hurricane (Flag Day flag match)

Winners wave their flag and have their anthem played. Geez, Rosey STILL has that gimmick? And they are representing the US? Oy. Rosey knocks down Sylvan to start for a two count and tags Hurricane, who kicks him down for another 2. Sly reverses a whip, but �Cane puts on the brakes and slugs Robert, but falls victim to a hotshot for 2. Resistance works him over in the corner, and Robert tags in. He gets 2 off a suplex and hits the chinlock. He whips Hurricane into the corner but runs into an uppercut and �Cane makes the tag. Rosey clears house and drops a leg on Sylvan for 2. Resistance tries a double team, but Rosey clotheslines them down. Hurricane drags Robert out and tries the Eye of the Hurricane, but Robert pushes him into the post. Back in, Rosey goes for a suplex, but Robert hooks his leg and Sylvan falls on top for the pin at 3:58. Sylvan belts out a stirring rendition of �Oh, Canada� but the fans don�t let him finish.

Rating: 1/10

Thoughts: Who celebrates Flag Day, anyway? If I tried to call in to work telling them that I celebrate Flag Day so I should get the day off, I�d be a laughingstock. Stupid nonsensical holidays.

Promo for the Diva contest. Three casting calls in New York, LA, and Chicago will give us 10 finalists, who will be voted off by the fans one by one until we have a winner. Winner gets a contract worth $250,000 and a free groping by Vince.

- Commercials - We�re now at the end of the first hour, and we�ve had a grand total of around 8:30 of wrestling. Awful.

- Lita is backstage, nervously looking at a home pregnancy test. She opens it, and heads to the toilet. Oh geez, here we go. As if this angle wasn�t stupid enough.

- Chris Jericho welcomes us to the Highlight Reel, and introduces his guest, Eugene. Jericho wonders if he is a Y2J fan, and gets a nod, so he asks Eugene what his favorite moment was. �When Jericho peed in Regal�s tea and he drank it. I did the same thing last week.� That makes Regal recoil in disgust. Jericho brings up HHH, who is Eugene�s favorite wrestler, and tells him that HHH isn�t anyone�s friend and Bischoff only made the match to get rid of Eugene. That brings out all of Evolution, which excites Eugene immensely. HHH introduces himself, and tells Eugene that Jericho is a liar. He�s the biggest friend Eugene has, even bigger than the Rock. He even brought him a present: a HHH hat, shirt, picture (which he autographs), and an Evolution shirt for Eugene to sign. �Just sign it on the naked girl�s butt.� He also wants a picture with Eugene. �Say Pedigree�, says HHH, which the crowd instantly gets worried over, but the picture is taken without incident. HHH tells Eugene that people who say bad things about him, like Chris Jericho, are just jealous and makes him promise to rat out anyone (with a stare at Regal) that speaks ill about HHH, which Eugene agrees to. Regal finally has had enough and leads Eugene out. HHH promises a great match next week (�you�ll have a good time. I know I will.�) and waves goodbye. He turns to see Jericho giving him the golf clap. �What are you looking at?� he says. Jericho congratulates him for putting one over on Eugene, but everyone else sees right through the manipulation and Jericho will be the first in line to cheer Eugene when he embarrasses HHH next week. HHH retorts that, like Jericho will get his tonight, HHH will get his title back.

Thoughts: See, THIS is the HHH that people can like. He was fantastic in this segment with the whole manipulation of Eugene, with a bit of comedy to boot. At first, I didn�t really like the idea of this match, but now, it�s got my attention. Plus, they�re in Miami next week��

- Stacy Kiebler walks into the women�s locker room looking for some elbowpads to borrow and finds an anxious Lita, who tells her that she is pregnant (after asking if she can trust Stacy to keep it quiet. In front of a camera. On television. We can only suspend our belief so far, guys.). Stacy is very happy for her and gives her a hug, as Lita looks worried.

- Commercials �

Stacy Kiebler and Nidia vs. Gail Kim and Molly Holly

Nidia schools Gail to start, forcing her to run and tag Molly. She works the arm, but Nidia escapes and tags Stacy, who boots her and chokes Molly with her boot in the corner. Stacy goes for a headcissors, but Molly tosses her onto the apron and Gail yanks her to the floor. Back in, Molly pulls on Stacy�s mouth and gets a two count and continues the beating on Stacy. Gail puts her in a variation of an anklelock, but Nidia breaks it up. Gail elbows her down and puts Stacy in a stretch muffler type hold (like Brock Lesnar�s Brock Lock) for the submission at 5:14

Rating: 1/10

Thoughts: Ugly, ugly women�s match. On the forums there�s a thread where people think up about the worst matchup ever, and I have a submission. How about Stacy Kiebler vs. Torrie Wilson in an Iron Woman match? The fans would either be gone, asleep, or would have committed mass suicide by the 8th minute.

- The Smackdown Rebound takes us to the break.

- Stills of the HIAC match from last night and a recap of Kane�s path of destruction. He�s apparently left the arena and Shawn Michaels apparently has a crushed larynx.

- Commercials �

Chris Jericho, Edge, and Chris Benoit vs. Evolution (w/HHH) (6-man elimination tag match)

Running out of time here, so I forsee rapid-fire eliminations around 11:00 PM. Jericho and Randy Orton start off, but Jericho controls most of the segment and Orton tags in Flair. Jericho wrings the arm and commences with the chopping, but Flair brings him in to the heel corner to take control. He chops him down and drops a knee before tagging Batista, who hits a powerslam for 2. Back to the heel corner and Flair tags back in. Chopfest is won by Jericho and he backdrops Flair and tags Edge, who adds a backdrop of his own before clotheslining Flair out. Orton comes in, but Benoit cuts him off and dumps him out as well, with the faces adding Batista to the ringside area. And we take a break.

Flair and Benoit are chopping away as we come back with Benoit getting the upper hand and Flair flopping to the mat. Benoit keeps the pressure on, hitting a backdrop and a headbutt, which leads to another Flop. Edge tags in, and Flair thumbs him in the eye, but gets clotheslined. Edge punches in the corner, but Flair takes him down with an inverted atomic drop and tags Orton. Edge takes him down and tags in the champ. Benoit gets a snap suplex, but Orton backs him into the heel corner and tags Batista, who drives Benoit to the mat with a spinebuster. He goes for the �Tistabomb and Jericho tries to stop him, but Batista clotheslines him down and almost knocks Edge off the apron before tagging Orton back in. He focuses on the neck and gets a European uppercut for 2. Flair tags in and zeroes in on the neck and shoulder also and chops him down for 2. He grabs an armbar, putting pressure on the neck. Benoit tries to rally, but Flair trips him up and tags Batista. Excellent work by the heels here. He gets a suplex, but Jericho breaks the pin. Batista whips Benoit sternum-first into the corner and drives his shoulder into the kidneys. Benoit avoids one more shot, sending Batista�s shoulder to the post and Benoit tags Jericho. Jericho goes for a bodypress, and Batista tries to counter into a powerslam, but Jericho escapes it and takes his knee out before going for the Walls, which Batista easily powers out of and nearly takes Edge�s head off with a clothesline, but Jericho hits a running enziguri for a close 2. Flair comes in and gets chopped out by Benoit and the faces use a spear/flying headbutt/Lionsault combo to eliminate Batista at 15:35.

Flair comes in and works on Jericho�s ribs before tagging Orton, who locks in a chinlock to slow things down, but Jericho escapes and hits a flying drop sleeper on Orton, making the tag to Edge. He spears Orton in the corner and hits a suplex for 2. Orton goes up, but Edge meets him there and hits a superplex. He preps the spear, but HHH trips him up and Flair tags in, dropping a knee for 2. Edge ducks another chop and hits a flying forearm. Flair goes up, and you can guess how that turns out. Man, Flair�s bumping like a bastard in this one. Old guy�s still got it. Jericho in, and he hits a forearm of his own before setting him up for the Lionsault, but Orton comes in, which draws in Benoit, who dumps him. Jericho flips out of a suplex and locks in the Walls, but HHH distracts the ref which allows Orton to hit an RKO for the Flair pin at 26:00. And we take another break. They are really going into overtime tonight. To make up for the Joe Schmo stuff, I guess.

Coming back, Orton rakes the eyes of Benoit to take control and tags Flair. Chopfest, and Flair begs off, while Benoit does the trash talking and delivers a snap suplex. Flair begs off again, but backs into the face corner, which allows Edge to get a shot in, and we get another Flop. Edge tags in, but Flair knees him in the gut to escape and tags Orton, who drops a knee of his own for 2. He hits the chinlock, which we really don�t need right now, and Edge fights out, hitting a wheel kick and tagging Benoit. We�re now at the 28:30 mark, and about 12 past the hour. Benoit knees Orton in the gut for 1, and Orton gets a knee of his own and tags Flair, who struts around and chops. Slugfest and Benoit ducks a punch and delivers two Germans. Orton prevents a third on Flair, only to get one himself before getting dumped out. Benoit takes Flair down with a shoulderblock and Orton and Edge tag in. Edge cleans house on the heels, backdropping Orton and spearing Flair, but Orton goes to Lower Uncton and hits the RKO for the pin at 31:20, leaving Benoit all by his lonesome.

Orton takes Benoit down and tags in Flair, who goes for the figure-four on Benoit, but Benoit counters it into the Crossface, and Flair is gone a minute or so later.

Orton pounds away on Benoit and drops a leg, but Benoit gets the rope on the pin attempt. Slugfest, and Benoit gets a German, but Orton blocks a second one and flies backwards into the ref. Benoit goes for a Sharpshooter, but HHH tries to interfere, so Benoit gives him a German. Orton goes for the RKO, but Benoit counters into the Crossface and Orton escapes, but Benoit locks in the Sharpshooter instead. HHH tries to crawl back in the ring to help, but Orton is spent and taps out at 34:33. Benoit and HHH stare each other down as we fade to black.

Rating: 7.5/10

Thoughts: When was the last time we got a half-hour match on RAW? It started out pretty slowly, but they picked it up fairly quickly, with all six guys on their game and delivering a lot of near falls, quick tags to keep things from getting too dull, and a lot of chopping. I have to also commend Ric Flair, the guy is pushing 60 and still can throw himself around pretty well, but you could tell that he isn�t quite up to the level that the other five guys are at anymore. One thing he still CAN do well is chop the flesh off a guy�s chest, and THREE Flair Flops make this pretty special. Excellent RAW main event. Hell, this wouldn�t have made that bad of a PPV main event, in my opinion.

Final Thoughts: The main event saved this show from being fairly disappointing. The Kane attack and the HHH-Eugene promo were well done, but there wasn�t much wrestling to be had in the middle of it all. And what wrestling we DID get wasn�t that good (I NEVER want to see Stacy Kiebler in the ring again). But still, if you missed the main event, you missed something pretty damn good.

That�s it for this week. Any e-mail can go to [email protected]. I�ll try and respond to what you have to say. If I don�t accidentally delete it, that is.


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