Hump Day News 4.16.03
By Peter Kostka
Apr 16, 2003, 14:18

Hey, look whose back. After seeing that TSM has had a lack of news reports these days (I guess Dr. Tom is “above” them now, what with his newfangled “education” endeavors) I decided to step in and revive the column I did at the site I started at, Smark Talk: the Hump Day News Report!! It’s got the style of a Midweek News, the hard-hitting social commentary of an Eric S. piece, and the fresh scent of pine. On the tape review front, I got that Smackdown Six comp I was harping about before, nut the guy who sent it to me decided to close shop, so don’t bet on getting your hands on a copy. I’ll review it next week. For now, let’s get on with it.

Let’s See, a Good Excuse to Why I’m so Lazy

Aliens kidnapped me and forced me into a really bad cabaret act? No.

I read Hyatte’s return column and am still reeling from repeated suicide attempts? No

I was just released from a mental institution after Patrick Spoon paid a visit and subjected me to his extensive techno collection? Ok, that'll do.

Uh, Oh, He’s Gonna Talk About the War

If you want to skip all this current events horse hockey, just scroll down to where it says “wrestling news starts.”

Is it me, or is the anti-war movement getting a little cranky that their predictions of doom and gloom didn’t come true and aren’t exactly dealing with it in the most mature ways? Tim Robbins spoke at a press dinner yesterday and went off on anything and everything, including the administration and Fox News (which he called “19th Century Fox”, har har). He also mentioned how he and his wife, Susan Sarandon, have been shut out of a few events due to their views. Now, I’m sorry that everyone doesn’t agree with them, but getting all pissy about it isn’t going to help things and just makes you look bad. The United Way and Cooperstown have the right to bar anyone they don’t want to have at their functions, no matter how dumb the reason is, as long as it’s not racial or sexual (and I have to admit, Dale Petrosky’s was a little on the petty side). Free speech is a two way street: you have the right to open your mouth and I have the right to laugh at the words that leave it. It makes it easier to laugh at them when those words are “Impeach Bush” (seriously, to some people it seems EVERY President deserves to be impeached for one reason or another) and “No blood for oil” (the protest equivalent of “WHASSUP!”)

Also, I’m not getting all this talk from people that the US is just going to turn left and go into Syria next. Who exactly in the Bush administration has said this (other than unnamed, unknown “sources close to the administration”)? Rumsfeld has charged them with aiding Iraq and possibly helping leaders flee. If the intelligence they get points that way, then why not let it be known that we’re on to them? Like it or not, this war has given the US some political clout that they wouldn’t have otherwise. Just look at North Korea: a few weeks ago they were adamant at face to face talks with the US without involving countries like S. Korea, Japan and Russia. They also stepped up their anti-US rhetoric. Now? They want multilateral talks and, at a celebration of Kim Jong Il’s birthday, there was virtually no anti-US talk. This war has put a little fear into countries like North Korea and most Middle Eastern nations. How they deal with it is another matter, of course, and another war would be idiotic for the Bush administration. I believe they should pressure Syria politically to turn over any WMD and leaders they MAY be hiding, work very hard to establish a Palestinian state (which probably would diffuse some of the hate of the US in the Arab world), and, most importantly, work on the economy, since that’s what sunk Bush Sr. in 1992.

I Be Pimpin’ Articles, Site-wide.”

Jay Spree has a review of EA’s Def Jam Vendetta, the marriage of No Mercy and the hip hop world. This review is pretty packed with pictures and thoughts on how it stacks up. I’ve played a little of it at work, it’s not bad.

Retro Rob and Patrick Spoon have your Saturday night covered with recaps of Velocity and Confidential

Brandon offers yet another of his muy excelente shoot video recaps with Disco Inferno being this week’s subject.

Josh Lowmon (owner of Smark Talk and Viewed Askew looks at this week’s TNA Xplosion

Also, vote in the Third Miss Smartmarks Tournament in the forums. The Elite Eight voting closes tonight at midnight.

Wrestling news starts here. (Note: all news is stolen from the usual places (411, Observer, Torch, etc.)

Up Next: James Marsters Chats with Spike Jones, Matt Hyson, and Spike Lee

In a monumentally stupid decision, TNN is planning to change the name of their new “for guys” network to *drumroll*: Spike TV!

I’ll hold for laughter………





All set? Who the hell is at the helm at TNN and who did he or she blow to get the job? What does the word “spike” have to do with ANYTHING about men? Is Viacom actually PAYING someone to come up with this shit? Yeah, those Star Trek and Miami Vice reruns are REAL manly programs. This is what the head chimp Albie Hecht (a real manly name) had to say about the name change.

"Today the first network for men has a name, and it's Spike TV. Spike TV captures the attributes and essence of what we want the first network for men to be. It's unapologetically male; it's active; it's smart; and contemporary with a personality that's aggressive and irreverent. This is a first major step in our journey to super-serving men in a way no one has done before."

I’d hold for more laughter, but I want to finish this within the next decade. If TNN actually goes through with this, the fall of the XFL will look like the Taliban by comparison.

Think Vince is somehow involved with this decision? This seems like his type of “this is my view of what people want, so it MUST be right” kind of thinking that gave us Katie Vick.

Down, Dirty N’ RAW

Well, after hearing Nash sound like a 16 year old girl trying to break up a fight between two best friends, I turned the channel and didn’t look back. I have pretty much given up on RAW as a whole, seeing the show as what it is: a directionless, boring, uninspired program which WWE doesn’t really know how to improve save for a complete overhaul (I mean new set, new announcers, new wrestlers, the whole shebang) which will never happen. Smackdown is circling the drain too with the absence of Angle and Edge and the belief that people still give a shit about Sable. Thank Joe for my SD 6 comp. Read JHawk’s recap if you want the gory details.

On the ratings front, RAW's dropped a notch to a 3.4 this week.

Angle’s Coming, Angle’s Coming, Angle’s Coming

According to the webmaster of Kurt Angle’s WWE site and Charlie Haas, Angle’s neck surgery went well, and the belief is that he will be back in about six weeks. Of course I hope Kurt comes back good as new and is able to give us the quality of wresting he has for the past three years or so, but I’m just not sure he should be coming back so fast. I mean, according to everything I read, his injury was even more serious than the injury that felled guys like Benoit, Rhyno and now Edge for a year. I realize that Angle went through the Olympics with a bad neck, but I gotta say, the WWE may be even more strenuous than the Olympics in that he’ll be wrestling 200+ days out of the year and one wrong bump could end it all. Here’s hoping all goes well.

Credit: Torch

More WWE Tidbits

- Rena Mero actually considered going to TNA instead of the WWE, going so far as to commit verbally to appear in April before changing her mind.

- Word is going around that the plan to have Goldberg win the World Title from HHH at the first RAW-specific PPV, Bad Blood, is in doubt thanks to (big surprise) some lobbying against the idea.

- Jeff Hardy was not at RAW because he was given time off to deal with personal problems. Let’s face it, Jeff’s a deteriorated basket case, it’s time for them to either give him whatever treatment or help he needs, or cut their losses and release him.

Credit: 411mania

TNA: Week 40

Bryan has another of his excellent TNA Previews, but here is what’s scheduled for tonight:

NWA World Tag Team Championship: XXX vs. Jerry Lynn & Amazing Red

Grudge Match: The New Church vs. Sandman & New Jack

X Title Match: Kid Kash w/Trinity vs. Mike Sanders

Street Fight: AJ Styles vs. Glen Gilberti

David Young vs. James Storm

Dames will chime in with his recap (hopefully he’ll be able to HEAR the show this week) late tonight or tomorrow.

Wanna Get Some Attention?

To close things out today, I’m sending out a call to anyone associated with a wrestling organization that wants a little pub. If you have a card coming up, some big news you want to put out, or a site you want plugged, send it all my way and you may see your name in cyber lights at the second biggest independent wrestling site on the ‘net (so says the Poster Formerly Known as El Cubano, Jay Bower). Thank you.

That’s it for this week, see you next time!

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