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Terminator 3 - The Rise of the Machines (The Fall of my Brain Cells)
Posted by Edward Robins on Jul 2, 2003, 05:24
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| Image courtesy KristannaLoken.no |
Well well well, look what the cat dragged in? Pop Culture's favorite slacker cult film reviewer with tickets to a preview showing of Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines. OK, enough gloating...I'm not sure about the rest of you, but I'd long declared this sequel unnecessary and bound to fail from the moment I first learned it to be anything more than a fanboy wet dream stuck in development hell. Should it have stayed there? Let's find out.
It's been a decade since the events of Terminator 2. Sarah Connor is dead, and John Connor is a shell of his former self, a cowardly drifter refusing to accept his destiny, unable to maintain a job or permanent residence for fear of being connected to any computer database (and thus Skynet). The date for Judgment Day had long past, and the world seems to be doing quite well for itself. Well, not exactly. The plot device known as Skynet miraculously survives destruction again, this time used as a controlling network for global communications while the military develops a prototype to automate their defense systems. By no means coincidentally, computers and cell phones nationwide are spontaneously wiped out by a mysterious virus, but nobody makes the connection. Because then there'd be no movie.
Instead our connection comes from the Terminatrix (Kristanna Loken), another evil terminator sent from the future (for such an intelligent entity, you'd think Skynet would learn to send out more than one of these things at a time), this time not after John Connor (seemed the boy managed to have kept himself off Skynet's radar for a while), but several different targets, the only two that matter being veterinarian Kate Brewster (Claire Danes) and her father, Robert Brewster, the man with his finger on the button to give Skynet control of the military (the other targets are quickly and easily disposed of early on in a span of a few minutes). But as always, with bad terminators comes my least favorite governing candidate (OMG POLITICS INSIDE A POP CULTURE COLUMN; BAN PLZ~!) Arnold Schwarzenegger. Nuclear holocaust is just around the corner, and it's up to Arnold to protect John and the Brewsters while holding off the Terminatrix (lovingly referred to as "T-X"), in the hope that Judgment Day might be stopped. Again.
What made Terminator 2 such a great film to me (and one of the classic examples of sequels improving on the original) was the humanity involved in the characters and their relationships, even amongst the Terminator, whom John Connor tried to teach how to be "human". In their first meeting, John greets the Terminator by talking of their past accomplishments. His response? "Sorry buddy, that was a different Terminator; now let us never speak of it again." And they never do...John tries to instill aspects of humanity and free thought once or twice throughout the film, but never puts in even a hint of the effort, or achieves any results like he did in T2 (at least not until the script demands, when out of the blue - "You've Got Morals!"). Similarly, when they take an unwilling Ms. Brewster along for protection, she acts coldly and uncooperatively, attempting to escape and call for help at every opportunity (and really, with a junkie has-been hero and his creepy buff friend talking of robots and the apocalypse, can you blame her?), only to inexplicably turn around to total compliance with heroics and the man in charge. The most realistic, clear and sensible relationship between the film is that of Kate and her father, and that's probably only because it's the standard "girl loves dad, dad's a high-ranking military official who can never see her and can't tell her why" deal; even this is given only a few lines of dialogue before being left to fend for itself against the big bangs and booms. The way these relationships work into the story of this film and the series' overlying story arc of the "war of man and machine" is vital, second only to that of Sarah Connor and Kyle Reese in the original film, but you'd never know it. I guess the assumption here is that everyone's already seen the first two, so the few threads provided for grasping are just enough to appease the true fans, and really, who needs a strong story when you've got action?
Alas, that is the road chosen with T3 - not how the characters can find the strength to save humanity, but the explosive, edge-of-your-seat thrill-ride involved in the saving of it. Except that, as happens to be the case, without any reason to really care for the almighty heroes John the Wimp and Kate the Token Ice Queen Turned Love Interest, the circumstances behind their continued safety is quite underwhelming. Thankfully, at least the latter half of the title holds true, as Loken and Schwarzenegger (both inapt actors quite apt at playing soulless mechanical beings) rise to the occasion of carrying all the multitudes of spotfests of vehicle chases (involving everything from police cars to construction cranes to hearses and trailers), attempted shoot-outs and crushings, and even a little good old fashioned grappling. For the first time in the series, the humans have absolutely no place other than plot device - this one's all about the cybernetics (to emphasize this fact even further, a "provision" of the T-X's programming is an innate code to destroy all other terminators in the vicinity), which is both good and bad. The good being that it's all very well done (with a budget of close to $200 million how could it be otherwise?) although like many action sequels it suffers from topping the sequences from the other film rather than inventing new ones; the bad being that, as mentioned earlier, the balance of story, character, and action is totally and forever skewed. This imbalance even affects the action - the wad's big enough that it's never fully blown, but by starting with and maintaining the same pace and standard (no matter how over-the-top) from the get-go for two hours, the extraordinary quickly becomes ordinary, and by the end almost boring. And of course, just because the film's focus is on the machines doesn't mean they benefit from any character dynamics either. Come on, this is Hollywood; there's no dollars in dynamics!
In the end, it's not even the frustrating lack of non-action substance that mars T3, but the wasted potential. To finally craft a follow-up to a film as beloved and unneeding of a follow-up as T2 after 12 years, the storyline innovations and improvements had better be as present as its technical ones, and there are a few points in the film that could've been, but buried amongst the action and just plain undeveloped, fizzled before they could reach their potential or even have a lasting effect. You'll have to forgive me for breaking form on this one, as I'm a bit tired to think of a way to do this beyond just listing what could have been (amateurs...). I shouldn't have to tell you by now that there are SPOILERS AHEAD (as always, I try and shy from the one or two true bombshells in case anyone still does want to see it):
- The T-X is given the ability to remotely control any machine (whether or not this is through the sudden spread of Skynet or "just 'cuz" is unexplained). Given the reliance of technology in our modern era that I'd always hoped these films were a statement against, this power alone would be enough to make the T-X unstoppable, nevermind the super strength and speed that always comes with evil cyborgs. However, rather than use this power throughout the film, it's only used twice; once for the first big chase sequence, and the second time in the penultimate showdown. Of those two examples, only the penultimate showdown is effective or clever (e.g. if she can hotwire and control any car, rather than send out various kamikaze cars, why not just stop John's car or hijack it to bring him in?). Unfortunately, even that occasion falls victim to the lack of character development, as it has little gravity and no suspense, and resolves itself in the standard "moving right along" form as the rest of the film's obstacles.
- Research & Development's been up to much more than Skynet. The first prototypes and drones seen only in flashbacks and nightmares in the other films are not just glimpsed but even activated by T-X to wreak havoc and stop John and Kate, but in their criminally few appearances, they're easily dispatched with simple bullets or a grenade. I'm not expecting unstoppable killers because that would weaken the duelling terminators, but with the fighters of the machine army as shabby as those presented in this film, it's hard to believe Skynet ever "won the war" in the first place.
- The T-X, unlike the terminators in the previous films, is modeled after a female. This could've made for that unique blend of sexiness and feminine assertion wherein a villainess uses her sex appeal to distract a male opponent - hilarious, devious, and a statement of cyber-grrrrl power. Fun for everyone, right? Wrong. The T-X is stopped by a cop early on and, without a proper code for how to react, spies a nearby "Sexy" billboard and increases her breast size, but the rest is all implied. In the next scene, she's wielding the cops gun, and again, a unique ability is never used again.
As disappointing as the rest of the film is, however, its ending is strong, cynical, and somewhat of a surprise. It's another bittersweet taste of what could have been. Were it connected to anything other than the Terminator series, the film would be a "safe", forgettable popcorn flick. As is, especially for big fans of the series, it manages to not be as terrible as it could've been (e.g. the lack of any character development spares us from a dopey romantic sub-plot) while simultaneously ruining the continuing story arc. Much as Anakin Skywalker will now always be the whiny brat that somehow became Lord Vader, John Connor is the coward who became leader against the machines by nothing other than simple fate. As bad-ass as Skynet and its latest technology is, it's still no match for an admittedly obsolete unit. I've never even seen the first Terminator film, and have only seen the second a handful of times, and yet this film's faults are so obvious it has me spouting off like a rabid fan boy. Make sure your brain switch is firmly set to off, and reprogram your memory to disconnect this as a Terminator film before viewing. Either that, or be prepared to be disappointed (this is the best way to go - my extreme cynicism was so satisfied with the ruined story that on the whole I'm actually satisfied [believe it or not] purely based on some of the action sequences, not because they're great, but because they ensure the whole film's not the bottom-of-the-barrel trash I'd expected). Or better yet, just don't view it at all.
'Til next time, don't use the internet. Ever. Skynet's watching. (cheap plug: unless it's to read my column - I Spit On Your Grave is coming Dames, I swears it!)
Edward Robins
[email protected]
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PS: Since I never write about something anyone wants to read, I rarely get to do plugs any more, so...read Jason Castleman's latest column and the One and Only Jay Spree's One and Only TuesDVDay News. That dastardly Dames has a big enough spotlight already with EWR.
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