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TNA
SmackDown from JHawk's Beak (6/10/2004)
Posted by Jared "JHawk" Hawkins on Jun 11, 2004, 09:03
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SmackDown from JHawk's Beak (6/10/2004)
by Jared "JHawk" Hawkins
OK, guys, I'm going to apologize to you for this recap for two reasons. Reason #1: It's late. Reason #2: It's incomplete. Totally my fault on both counts.
Basically, I wasn't home most of the day. I worked until 5pm (the district manager was in all day, and being the first one in it was lecture time) and I had some errands to run afterwards, so I set my VCR for the show figuring I wasn't going to make it home in time. And since I was going to be late for the show anyway, I decided I might as well hit poker night and do the recap all at once.
Long story short, I apparently set my VCR to start for 9:00 instead of 8:00, so I've only got the second half of the show on tape. So the first half of the recap is going to be in summary form based off of the spoiler reports, while the second half is going to be done as normal. Let me assure you that I will be home the next two Thursdays, so until Peter takes over this show in July this will not happen again.
And to top it all off, that ten dollar buy-in doesn't last very long when you can't seem to get a good hand without someone having a straight. I didn't have a good day at all yesterday. Thank God for Ring of Honor on Saturday night.
Now for the summarized first half of the show.
General Manager Kurt Angle asks for an apology from Booker T and John Cena, and while he gets one from Booker T (with Booker giving one "I'm sorry" for each WCW Title reign), Cena won't give one and threatens to finish the job. Angle informs Cena that he's on probation, so one shot and he'll be stripped of the U.S. Title. And since Cena won't apologize, Angle forces Cena into a triple play challenge. He will face Booker T, Rene Dupree, and Rob Van Dam in a series of five minute matches, and whoever beats him will get the shot at the United States Title at the Great American Bash.
Kenzo Suzuki debuts and defeats Scotty 2 Hotty in short order with some sort of jujitsu throw. Scotty has officially gone from tag team champion to sacrificial lamb in less than three months.
John Cena's opponent draw straws to determine the first opponent. Why not just use the eenie meenie miney mo method next week?
John Bradshaw Layfield gets out of his limo, says "Screw this", and goes back to his limo. He asks to be taken back to New York City...and it turns out Eddy Guerrero is driving the limo.
The Dudley Boys drink at whatever place they're keeping Paul Bearer, and Heyman says he's on his way to the arena to get Taker's answer.
Rey Misterio Jr. takes one Chavo Guerrero Jr., with Chavo Classic doing commentary at ringside with some young ladies at his side. Rey gets the pin after Chavo Classic's interference backfires and Rey gets in a roll up. Father and son argue after the match. I did see the second half of this one waiting for poker to start and liked what I saw.
The <a href="http://thesmartmarks.com/artman/publish/article_1475.shtml" raw rebound was here, and that's where my tape starts, which I believe is in
Segment 5
Some people have some boxes in the parking garage and are tossing them aside, apparently cleaning up after Eddy started joyriding earlier, but they hurry the hell out of the way as JBL's limo comes into the parking garage of the Nassau Coliseum, smoke pouring out of the hood. That car got into really bad shape in less than an hour. And Eddy backs the limo into another car...and he's on his way to the arena.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
So there's your abbreviated first half of the show. My thoughts:
I've only seen Kenzo Suzuki once and didn't see this match at all, so I'll hold off judgment.
The format for the Cena match seems awfully reminiscent of the Deadly Draw that TNA did a few weeks ago, but if the format is for individual singles matches then it could be interesting.
What I saw of Chavo vs. Rey was really good, although I can't say I was watching too closely since I thought I was taping it and would look closely at it later. *sigh* Yesterday was not a good day.
Anyway, let's watch what I can of the show here.
Segment 6
Earlier tonight, Eddy told Bradshaw they were going to have more fun than at Disneyland, and moments ago the parking garage represented the bumper cars at Six Flags.
And Eddy Guerrero drives the limo into the arena, and there is a lot of damage to that car. One of the longhorns has fallen off the thing. Eddy opens the door for Bradshaw, and we see John Bradshaw Layfield knocked out in the back. I'd like to know how the camera isn't damaged...or why it was in the limo in the first place. Eddy's got the stick, and he's not worried about getting banged up. He asks Bradshaw if he had a rough night. Bradshaw wakes up and sees the damage to his car. Eddy says the car looks a little banged up, just like Bradshaw will be at The Great American Bash. Bradshaw tries in vain to put his limo back together as Eddy laughs at him.
The Undertaker has to make his decision tonight: Join Paul Heyman or never see Paul Bearer again. But next, the triple play challenge!
COMMERCIAL BREAK
They went a long way for that metaphor. No wonder Vince McMahon has lost like half a billion dollars over two or three years; on top of flops like the XFL, they destroy a good car about once a month on average, and usually for no apparent reason. Does anybody want to see this rematch because a limo got destroyed?
Segment 7
Last week, the superstars of SmackDown went to Italy and Germany. No footage of Bradshaw doing his Adolf Hitler impression.
My Olympic Hero takes his spot at the top of the stage, and it's time for John Cena to take part in the triple play challenge.
Triple Play Challenge Match #1 with a 5:00 time limit: John Cena (United States Champion) vs. Booker T
Knee to the midsection by Booker T, and he starts pounding away at him. Bodyslam. Kicks to the midsection. Snap mare for 2. Cena comes back with some elbows. Corner whip, clothesline for 2. Four minutes left as Cena gets a vertical suplex for 2. Booker catches Cena and takes him down with a Hotshot. Leg lariat for 2. Cena with a small package for 2, and Booker is quickly back in control. 3:00 left. Leg lariat for 2. Reverse chinlock with a half nelson, and Angle yells that Booker should watch the clock. Brian Hebner checks the arm, and it only drops twice. Fists and knees to the midsection, and Cena coming back with right hands...but he runs into a flapjack. Flying leg lariat for 2 with 1:00 to go. Booker goes for the Scissor Kick, but Cena levels him with a clothesline for 2. Suplex by Booker for 2 with 20 seconds left. Ten seconds. Booker goes for the Scissors Kick, but time runs out as Cena avoids it.
Triple Play Challenge Match #2 with a 5:00 time limit: John Cena (United States Champion) vs. Rob Van Dam
COMMERCIAL BREAK
Nothing offensive with this format so far, although I never got the sense of urgency out of Booker T that has to be there in this type of match. You've only got five minutes to earn a title shot if you want it. Why waste like 20 seconds before going to the Scissors Kick? If you don't cover the man with at least four seconds left, you can't win.
Segment 8
RVD with a small package for 2 ten seconds in, then another quick near fall. Side headlock by Cena. Shoulderblock for 2. Huracanrana for 2. Kick for 2. 4:00 remain. RVD goes for the rolling monkey flip, Cena moves out of the way, and RVD flies off the second rope into a Cena clothesline that earns Cena a near fall. That was sweet looking. Shoulderblock for 2. 3:00 remain. RVD with an elbow. Bodyscissors rollup for 2. Running knee by Cena, then into a vertical suplex for 2. Cena goes for the F-U, but RVD avoids it and takes Cena down with a spin kick for 2. 2:00 remain. A series of forearms, and right into RVD's kick. Front slam, split-legged moonsault for 2. RVD up top, and Booker crotches him off the top rope...and Angle is PISSED and orders Booker T from the arena. Under 1:00 left. Cena goes for a superplex, but RVD shoves him off the turnbuckle. 30 seconds. Flying side kick. 15 seconds. Five Star Frog Splash, but RVD can't cover before the end of the time limit.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
And that was a bit better as far as the sense of urgency goes (although not by much), but why is Cena trying so hard to get falls instead of milking the time limits? OK, if he gets a pin he has to wrestle less, but he's not getting the pins. So the one time a chinlock might be the way to go, and he doesn't do it?
Segment 9
Triple Play Challenge Match #3 with a 5:00 time limit: John Cena vs. Rene Dupree
Cena takes Dupree down with a double leg takedown. Dupree works into a quick series of pin attempts, and Cena keeps kicking out. Dupree with a series of shoulderblocks to the midsection. 4:00 left. Abdominal stretch. Cena finally counters with a hiptoss. Double leg takedown by Dupree, and a near fall after a series of body shots. 3:00 remain as Cena tries in vain to make a comeback, but he gets a sunset flip for 2. Dupree with a backbreaker for 2. Cena tries to fight back again. Boot to the face, and a mid-ring collision knocks both men down. 2:00 left. Cena with a series of right hands. Clotheslines. Cena favoring the hip, and a Five Knuckle Shuffle for 2. Pump up the shoes with 1:00 left, but Dupree avoids the F-U and gets the spinebuster for 2. Another cover for 2 with 30 seconds left. And it's Dupree just going for cover after cover until the 10 second mark. He goes for a power bomb out of desperation, but time runs out. Dupree says he's got him beat and wants five more minutes...and Angle agrees. Cena with some right hands, but Dupree takes him straight down. French Tickler. Cena counters a clothesline and hits the F-U...and he gets the pin 44 seconds into overtime. Angle immediately says the win isn't official because it came after the five minutes, and out comes Booker T to pound away at him. Rob Van Dam runs out to make the save and get some revenge for Booker costing him his shot earlier. A clothesline sends Booker over the top rope, and Angle says that since no one man beat him, he'll simply face all three of them in a fatal four way at the Great American Bash. RVD makes the "I want the belt" pantomime, and Cena's all "It's mine bitch", so RVD kicks him in the head to Kurt Angle's approval.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
Now that was the best match of the entire segment there. Dupree desperately wanted to get the pin, and he went for it and went for it and continued to go for it. That is the sense of urgency I didn't get out of the first two matches of the sequence. Add the teasing of a potential heel turn for Rob Van Dam, and you've actually got a match at the Great American Bash that I'm interested in seeing. The best part? All three guys basically had the match won at the time limit, so even though Cena got the win, it looks as though any of the three men can get the win at the Bash. Good stuff from match three, and let's call the whole thing **1/2 overall.
TNA Impact gets local ad time on the Cleveland UPN affiliate. Cool.
Segment 10
We recap the Dudley Boys-Paul Heyman-Undertaker storyline.
Members of the New York Jets are in attendance.
Paul E. Heyman makes his way to the ring. Heyman tells us to hit the record button because history is being made. But I thought bootleggers were evil and stuff. But history is about to change forever, because this is the moment that Paul Heyman becomes the most powerful man in WWE by taking control of The Undertaker. Either that, or we get to see Paul Heyman rest in peace. Either way, we're going to have a great time, right? Heyman admits it's been a hell of a ride. "The course of history demands your answer now." The Undertaker comes out and stares Heyman down, and Heyman pulls the urn out of his gym bag. Taker takes a few steps toward him....stares him down...and drops to one knee. Taker has apparently joined Paul Heyman!
END OF SHOW
I didn't care when Taker was forced to rejoin Paul Bearer in 1997, and I don't care now. But at least in 1997 it was a fresh idea. The only difference is a person is the bait rather than a secret. Besides, how long is this really going to last? Either we get Paul Bearer back and Taker gets the urn back, or he never sees Bearer again anyway and turns back to the "good" side because he was lied to. Call me when you add some sort of original element to this storyline.
Overall, this show was a little too sports entertainment heavy, but I liked what I did see out of the show from an in-ring standpoint. Chavo Jr. and Rey got enough time to put on an actual match, and the triple play challenge established three guys as viable challengers for the title. Now if they would only capitalize off the momentum of the first JBL-Eddy match to make the buildup interesting instead of thinking "Destroying cars is kewl", maybe we'd have something here.
I'll be at Ring of Honor's show in Dayton this week, so expect that report sometime Sunday. Until then, feedback is welcome and encouraged.
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