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Wrestling > TNA

WWE Heat Recap: December 8th, 2002
Posted by Peter "FakeRazor" Ramon on Dec 10, 2002, 11:31

Hey yo...

I would have had this up yesterday afternoon, but as I'm sure you all have noticed now, there are some problems with the site and board. Dames answers all of our questions about the site and board here.

I just finished reading �Sex, Lies, and Headlocks� a little while ago. It�s a definite good read. It takes an in depth look at the entire wrestling business from the early days with the formation of the NWA, all the way up until earlier this year. If you�re looking for a biography on Vince McMahon though, then this isn�t what you�re looking for. This is more of a look at the wrestling business as a whole, centered around Vince McMahon. Still, it�s a great read for any fan out there. Thumbs up.

My Smackdown 4 game is coming along nicely. I�m still playing as Chris Benoit, and I�ve been involved in some pretty cool angles. I ended my 2002 with a feud between the RAW and Smackdown brands (I was the champion, but fighting for Smackdown), which culminated with McMahon winning back the whole company from Flair. The game seems to have forgotten that happened, as it�s still calling Flair 50% owner of the company, but hey, I�m having a blast.

Early on in 2003, Vince brought in the nWo. The angle in the game replicates the real life angle almost perfectly. Vince started it off with the LETHAL POISON promos. The next thing I know, I�m getting jumped by Hogan, X-Pac and Nash. They even put the crappy ambulance angle in the game, but it was worth a good laugh. The feud culminated with a title match with Hogan at Wrestlemania, which I won. Seeing Benoit do Hogan�s poses was priceless. Anyway, much like in real life, Hogan turned face the next night, and formed an alliance with me to fight off the nWo, which now included The Big Show and Shawn Michaels. After we took care of them in a tag match, I moved onto a feud with Kurt Angle, which culminated at Backlash, with yet another win by Benoit. I�ve been having a blast, and if you haven�t checked out Shut Your Mouth yet, then you really owe it to yourself to at least rent it.

Anyway, onto the real reason you clicked on this article...

The pyro goes off, and it�s time for yet another weekly installment of WWE Heat!

Your hosts are, as per usual, the second most annoying Coach in WWE history and Lita, who needs no introduction when it comes to her horrible commentary.

Here comes Stacy Keibler to start things off. Wow, someone other than D�Lo, Stamboli, Raven, Credible or a jobber! YAY! She�s sporting the new �I Love Testicles� shirt (the joke is already getting old). She calls Test down to the ring, and Stacy gives Test a lap dance in the corner. Poor Test, I hope he doesn�t get a boner before he has to wrestle.

Speaking of boners, here comes Justin Credible, the human penis to interrupt this. Wait a second. Testicles, and the Human Penis! We�ve got the whole male anatomy covered in this bout.

Match One: Test(icle) vs. Justin �The Human Penis� Credible
This match brings a whole new meaning to the term cockslapping. Credible tries to catch Test off guard, but Test hits him with a big elbow. Irish whip by Test, into a neckbreaker. Another whip by Test, but Credible slides out of the ring. Stacy slaps Credible�s ass, and tosses him back in the ring. Gorilla Press Slam by Test, followed by some elbows in the corner, and a whip by Test to the other corner. Credible tries to leapfrog over Test, but Test catches him in the powerslam position. Credible slides out, shoving Test into the corner shoulder first. Arm breaker by Credible as Test comes out of the corner. He wraps Test�s arm around the ring post a few times, and locks Test in an armbar. Hey, at least Credible is trying to have a decent psychological match. Test fights out of it with a Sidewalk slam. Test goes for an elbow drop to follow up, but no one�s home. Test charges at Credible in the corner, but gets hit with a boot to the face. Credible charges at Test, but gets hit with a tilt-a-whirl slam. Credible gets up, but gets hit with a few clotheslines from Test, and an elbow to the midsection. Test tries for the pumphandle slam, but Credible slides out and goes off the ropes. Test catches him in a full nelson slam... but Credible puts his foot on the ropes. Test goes for the Big Boot, but Credible pulls the ref in the way, and Test balks. Test pushes the ref out of the way, but Credible blindsides and throws Test�s shoulder into the ring post, right into a rollup! Feet on the ropes... 1..2..KICKOUT by Test. Credible tries for a kick to the midsection, but Test grabs his foot, whips him off the ropes and hits the big boot for the win.
*

Chris Nowinski and D�Lo Brown are backstage. D�Lo says he doesn�t want to team up with Nowinski tonight because he doesn�t like him, but Nowinski convinces him to team with him after telling D�Lo that Maven is stealing all of D�Lo�s RAW air time. D�Lo tells Nowinski that he could be right, and says he�ll team with Nowinski tonight. Gah, I hope they aren�t turning D�Lo heel, but he did show signs of it three weeks ago in his match with Spike Dudley.

WWE Rewind:
The rewind for this week is Christian and Chris Jericho laying out the Dudley�s on RAW this past week. This leads us into our...

RAW Recap: Booker T vs. Chris Jericho... no... Booker T and Goldust vs. Chris Jericho and Christian
I despise this �Chief Morley� gimmick. Why the hell do they need two authority figures on RAW?

The main event for tonight is Chris Nowinski and D�Lo Brown vs. Maven and Al Snow. It's nice to see some new guys thrown in the mix here.

RAW Retro:
This week�s Heat edition of RAW Retro is Steve Austin driving the Zamboni to the ring to crash McMahon�s title presentation. Classic stuff. Commercials follow.

Extreme Blast of the Night:
Scott Steiner beating the hell out of WHACKO Steven Richards.

Speaking of Richards, here he comes for a match with Johnny Stamboli. I�ve probably seen this same match about 82934798123729837489273 times since I�ve been writing these Heat recaps.

Match Two: WHACKO Steven Richards vs. Johnny Stamboli
Richards starts with a kick to the midsection, a chop and some brawling in the corner. Stamboli fires back with a clothesline and a dropkick. Stamboli whips Richards off the ropes, and hits a shoulderblock for two. Stamboli beats Richards� head into the top turnbuckle, and whips him to the other turnbuckle, followed by a clothesline. Another whip by Stamboli, but this time he misses the shoulderblock. Richards tosses Stamboli out of the ring in between the top and second ropes. Richards chases after him, but gets whipped into the barricade. He retaliates by whipping Stamboli into the ring post, and wrapping his arm around the ringpost. Richards tosses Stamboli back into the ring, and fist drops him in the back. Arm wringer on the ground by Richards, followed by an armbar. Nice to see Richards concentrating on one part of the body. Stamboli fights out and tries for a DDT, but Richards slips out, and takes Stamboli down by his arm. Richards goes right back to the armbar, nice strategy. Stamboli fights to his feet, and gets out of the hold with a sidewalk slam for two. Richards won�t let up though, as he takes Stamboli down by his arm again, right into an armbar. This time he lets up. Stamboli gets up and tries to send Richards to the corner, but Richards reverses it and sends Stamboli into the corner, front side first. Richards tries to send Stamboli to the corner, but Stamboli reverses it. Richards stops himself from nailing the turnbuckle by putting his foot on the second turnbuckle, turns around and hits a clothesline. They brawl back and forth, with Stamboli getting the edge with a clothesline, a shoulderblock and a neckbreaker. Stamboli sends Richards to the corner and hits a nice overhead belly to belly suplex for two. Stamboli tries to whip Richards into the corner again, but Richards reverses it, and catches Stamboli in the Stevie-T for the win.

After the match, Victoria comes down to celebrate by biting Richards� chin. Yikes.
*

Here�s Raven to start his masterpiece. Some guy named Mike and him are enjoying a boxed lunch. Raven asks Mike if he�s greedy. Mike says not really. This prompts Raven to take out his sandwich, remove the top slice of bread, and step on it. Raven offers Mike $500 to eat the sandwich while his foot is on it. Mike reluctantly accepts, and eats the sandwich, while Raven says �I give you greed!� That�s one sin down, and 6 more to go. Raven says Mike is sick, and just like everyone else out there. He calls him a hypocrite and a sinner. He tosses Mike the money, and cheap shots him with a double axehandle. Raven grabs poor Mike�s hand and... BREAKS HIS FINGER.

A Triple H vs. Shawn Michaels promo follows, followed by commercials.

Tough Enough III Recap:
Check out Patrick Spoon�s recap of the show for more on this.

D�Lo and Nowinski vs. Maven and Al Snow is next, but not before more commercials.

RAW Recap: Triple H vs. RVD, Special Guest Referee, Shawn Michaels
Yeah, Triple H won, giving us another HHH vs. Shawn Michaels match at Armageddon. You know the deal.

D�Lo and Nowinski vs. Maven and Al Snow is next. For real this time. Well, after the commercials.

Maven and Snow come out to a nice pop. Maven�s theme fucking rules. Nowinski and D�Lo get some pretty good heat. God, I hope D�Lo doesn�t turn into a full fledged heel. He�s hella over as a face already. Then again, who knows? Maybe a heel turn is just what he needs to be promoted to RAW.

Hey, this should be a fun match. It�s nice to get some new blood on Heat, especially when it involves Al Snow and Chris Nowinski.

Main Event: Al Snow and Maven vs. D�Lo Brown and Chris Nowinski
Wow, D�Lo is getting some pretty damn good heel heat going into this one, as a �D�Lo sucks!� chant fills the arena prior to the start of the match. D�Lo and Snow start out. D�Lo cheap shots Al with a club to the back. D�Lo whips Snow into the corner, but Snow drops down and slides away from the turnbuckle. Al grabs D�Lo and hits him with the HEADBUTTS OF DOOM, and chants to the crowd. D�Lo catches Snow off guard with a thumb to the eye, and tries to go for the cover by Nowinski cowers and drops to the floor. D�Lo gets bodyslammed twice by Snow for his troubles, followed by a hammerlock. Snow tags in Maven, and Maven kicks D�Lo in the arm. D�Lo fights out of the hammerlock, hits a heel kick on Maven, and tags in Nowinski. Nowinski cowers again and tags D�Lo back in. Maven wrings D�Lo�s arm some more, and Snow tags himself in. Al keeps working on the arm, but D�Lo punches out. Nowinski distracts Snow, and gets dropped to the mat with a reverse jawbreaker. Snow walks right into D�Lo�s arms, and D�Lo hits the Sudden Impact for two. D�Lo tags in Nowinski, and they double team Snow with some brawling. D�Lo holds Snow back while Nowinski goes to work with rights and lefts. Meanwhile, Coach and Lita make doggie noises. Please, get them out of the booth. NOW.

Back to the match. Nowinski grabs Snow before he can tag Maven in, and tags D�Lo back in. They both stomp the hell out of Snow, and D�Lo body slams Snow. D�Lo sets up for the Shaky Shaky Legdrop, but he bails on it and tags Nowinski in. Nowinski gets whipped laid out by Al Snow with a clothesline. Snow crawls for the tag, but Nowinski tags D�Lo in, and D�Lo knocks Maven off of the apron. Snapmare by D�Lo, into a rear chinlock. Snow brawls out of it, and tries for sunset flip, but can�t get D�Lo over all the way. D�Lo does the shaky shaky taunt, which gives Al the time to roll D�Lo up for two. Clothesline by D�Lo, followed by another bodyslam. D�Lo picks Snow up again, and tries for the Sudden Impact, but Snow reverses it into a DDT! NICE! You know the drill. Snow and D�Lo crawl to their respective corners slowly, and they both make the tag. TIME FOR MASSIVE HEEL BEATDOWN! Maven clears the ring with clotheslines and back drops all around. All four men are in the ring now. D�Lo whips Maven into Nowinski, who hits a clothesline. Snow pancakes D�Lo, but then Nowinski clotheslines him. Maven catches Nowinski off-guard with the DROPKICK OF DOOM. Lita calls this whole sequence with the eloquence of a drunk Mae Young. D�Lo catches Maven with the Sky High out of nowhere, but Snow takes D�Lo out before he can take advantage. Nowinski tries to hit Maven with THE BOOK, but Maven ducks and rolls Nowinski up, broken up by D�Lo. Snow tackles D�Lo to the outside, now it�s Nowinski and Maven brawling back and forth. Nowinski takes Maven down a la Jericho�s takedown for the Walls of Jericho, puts his feet on the ropes and covers Maven... 1...2...3! D�Lo and Nowinski win. Not bad.
**

Bottom Line: This was one of the better recent episodes of Heat, just for the sheer fact that it had some new people on it. The main event was a decent enough match, and the two other matches weren�t bad either. It�s amazing what a little fresh content can do to a show.

Peter "FakeRazor" Ramon

As always, you can reach me here.

whacked Out wrestling




 

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