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WWE Heat Recap: December 22nd, 2002
Posted by Peter "FakeRazor" Ramon on Dec 23, 2002, 22:26
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Hey yo...
Before I start, I just want to wish everyone a very happy holiday.
Does anyone actually celebrate Kwanza? I haven�t met one person.
Armageddon was a good show if you ask me. Benoit and Guererro had the match of the night, a match that will easly grab some MOTY votes. Kurt Angle took the title off of The Big Slow, and smart marks everywhere rejoiced. HHH vs. HBK was a good enough match to me, actually, I quite enjoyed it. So sue me.
Annnyway, the pyro goes off, and it�s time for this week�s installment of WWE Heat.
Your hosts are, as always, Jonathan Coachman and Lita.
Here comes... Al Snow to start things off! Wow, it looks like they�re trying to make Heat somewhat entertaining with a fresh face. His opponent for this week is... a familiar face to all Heat fans, Johnny Stamboli.
Match One: Al Snow vs. Johnny Stamboli
Tie-up to start, headlock by Al Snow. Stamboli counters with a hammerlock. Snow counters with a drop toehold and a front facelock. Stamboli counters with a hammerlock again, and brings all down with a headlock takedown. Waistlock by Stamboli, reversed into another waistlock by Al Snow, and he takes Stamboli down. Two armdrags and an armbar follow by Snow. Snow wrings the arm, but Stamboli fight so ut with a whip. Snow hits a forearm on Stamboli, and Stamboli rolls to the outside. Snow chases him, but Stamboli takes advantage of Snow and stomps him when he gets back in the ring. They brawl back and forth, until Snow hits a Russian legsweep for two. More brawling, and a �We want head� chant starts up. Backbreaker by Stamboli. Two elbow drops by Stamboli lead up to a chokehold, broken at 4. Stamboli gets Snow in the corner and hits him with the battering ram for two. Stamboli brawls away some more, and hits a scoop slam for two. Snow gets trapped in the corner again, with some hard knees from Stamboli. Stamboli chokes Snow in the corner, broken at 4. Snow finally fights back with a clothesline out of desperation, followed by some rights and lefts, and the HEADBUTTS OF DOOM! Snow catches Stamboli with two more clotheslines and a BAAAAACK body drop, followed by a scoop slam. Snow heads to the top rope, but misses his moonsault! Stamboli leaps to the top rope with great balance and hits a diving leg drop for the win. Snow did a tremendous job putting Stamboli over. Poor Al, he can�t even beat a jobber like Stamboli on Heat. He�s got to be one of the most underutilized talents... EVER.
*1/4
Spike Dudley (GAH!) Is backstage with Michael Shayne and SCOOT ANDREWS~! They�re here for a tryout match. Holy crap, this could be cool. They ask Shane for advice on getting a job with WWE, and Spike tells them you have to be in shape, be tough, and have a good attitude. HA! Shane and Andrews joke about Spike�s size and say if he can have a job, why can�t they? Well, that�s a hell of a point. I�d take the black Ric Flair over Spike Dudley ANY DAY OF THE WEEK. Tommy Dreamer overhears their comments, and takes offense to it, because Spike and he are old chums. Looks like Dreamer and Spike vs. Andrews and Shayne will be next. The main event for tonight (RE: Last Monday) is Jacqueline vs. Molly Holly. You can cut the anticipation with a knife.
Commercials follow.
Lugz uhhh... Boot of the Week:
This week�s boot of the week is Booker T and Goldust winning the tag titles at Armageddon.
Here comes Spike Dudley and Tommy Dreamer. I sure hope this isn�t a complete squash. Michael Shayne and SCOOT ANDREWS are their opponents.
Match Two: Spike Ugly and Tommy Dreamer vs. Michael Shayne and SCOOT ANDREWS~!
I�m really excited to see Andrews work, because I hear he�s excellent. �EC-DUB!� chants fill the arena. Shayne and Dreamer start with a Tie-up, waistlock by Dreamer, countered into a waistlock by Shayne. Dreamer takes Shayne down with a fireman�s carry, right into an armbar. Dreamer gets Shayne in a headlock, and Shayne powers out. Irish whip by Shayne. Shayne goes to leapfrog Dreamer, but Dreamer stays put and nails Shayne with a big right hand and an arm wringer. Dreamer yells something to Spike, and Shayne takes advantage of that by punching Dreamer and tagging in Andrews. Andrews gets hiptossed right away, followed by an arm wringer and a tag to Spike. Spike hits Andrews with a double axe handle off the top, and goes right for the arm. Andrews sells the arm well. Discus clothesline by Spike, followed by a neckbreaker by Spike for two. Irish Whip by Spike, reversed by Andrews. Shayne pulls the rope down, and Spike topples over the top to the ground. Shayne works on Spike behind the refs back and tosses him back in the ring. Nice heel tactics. Andrews hits Spike with a club to the neck, and tags in Shayne. They double whip Spike into the corner HARD. Shane covers Spike for two. Shayne goes to work with some rights and a whip, but Spike pulls off a Sunset flip for two. Spike goes off the ropes, but Andrews hits him with a knee to the back, and Shayne hits Spike with a clothesline. Shayne tags Andrews in, and they whip Spike into the corner a few times backwards. They twist Spike around, wrapping their arms around his neck... and hit a double sleeper hold drop! That was nice. Snapmare by Andrews, right into a headlock. Spike elbows out, but Andrews shoves Spike right down to the ground, and tags Shayne back in. Foot choke by Shayne in the corner, followed by some brawling and a front facelock. Spike tries to tag in Dreamer, but Shayne punches Dreamer. Dreamer tries to get in the ring, but the ref keeps him back. While the ref isn�t looking Shayne and Andrews stomp away on Spike in the corner. Foot choke by Andrews in the corner, followed by a whip and a nice dropkick for two. Andrews tags in Shayne again and Shayne eye rakes Spike and shoves him down to the mat. Shayne sets Spike up on the top rope for a superplex... and... Spike punches out of it. Spike hits... THE MOST ANNOYING MOVE IN WWE TODAY, where he just jumps off the top rope and lands on his opponent�s chest with both feet. You know the drill, Dreamer gets tagged in, Andrews gets tagged in, and it�s MASSIVE HEEL BEATDOWN TIME! Dreamer takes Andrews out with some brawling, and takes Shayne out with a neckbreaker. Spinebuster on Andrews... Shayne elbow drops to break it up, but Dreamer moves out of the way and Shayne nails his own partner. All four men are in the ring now.. DEATH VALLEY DRIVER by Dreamer on Shayne, and a Dudley Dog on Scoot Andrews... but Spike LANDS ON SHAYNE, and Dreamer pins Shayne for the win. Decent match. Shayne and Andrews impressed me with their heel tactics and teamwork. Good work.
**
They shill tonight�s main event as Molly Holly (Where the hell has she been?) vs. Jacqueline again. God damn, how many times have we seen that match on Heat?
RAW Retro: Mr. Socko debuts
Classic moment. McMahon is in the hospital, and Foley comes to cheer him up with Yurple the Clown and MR. SOCKO. Stone Cold disguises himself a doctor, and beats the hell out of McMahon, smashing him over the head with a bed pan. Commercials follow.
Segment on Victoria�s new theme:
That theme cracks me the hell up. I don�t really know if it fits Victoria, but whatever, it�s funny. Commercials follow.
RAW Recap: When Steroids Attack
Well, looks like we�re going to get HHH vs. Steiner sooner than I expected. I saw this happening at Wrestlemania, but I guess we�ll be getting the battle of the roid monkeys at Royal Rumble. Classic line by HHH, �Here, you earn your shot at the heavyweight championship.� Irony at it�s best. Commercials follow.
BOD Man Body Slam of the week:
Well this is a new one. The body slam of the week is Shawn Michaels going through 4 tables at Armageddon. There�s lots of mixed reviews out there on this match, but I�ll confess and say that I liked this match. I give it ****.
RAW Recap: Y2J vs. HBK
THIS feud will make RAW watchable. Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels is another one of those dream matches that no one ever thought would happen. The mic work between the two will be outstanding, and the match itself could be outstanding. I really hope the bookers don�t find a way to fuck up a sure fire angle like this one. Hopefully HBK puts Jericho over (Possible pipe dream), because HBK himself said he wants to put the young guys over. Then again, Shawn is a fucking liar.
Main Event: Molly Holly vs. Jacqueline
Well, it�s nice to see Molly back on TV this week. As always Jacqueline is an eye sore on my television screen.
Tie-up to start, arm wringer by Molly, reversed by Jackie. Jackie shoves Molly down, and cradles her for two. Tie-up again, side headlock by Molly. Jackie shoves out, but gets hit with a shoulder block. Jackie gets right up and hits three arm drags in a row on Molly, followed by a drop toehold. Molly rolls out of the ring claiming she injured her hand. Of course, she�s faking, and blind sides Jackie, slamming her into the steel steps, and into the ring. Molly tosses Jackie into the ring, and hits a nice snap suplex for two. Molly stomps away on Jackie, and rakes Jackie�s face, followed by a rear chinlock, uhh, I think. Jackie elbows out, and hits a crossbody coming off the ropes for two. Molly fights right back with a clothesline for two, followed by a nice neckbreaker for two. Right back to that rake to the face by Molly. Molly chokes Jackie with the ropes, and Molly breaks at 4. Jackie gets whipped into the corner, but Molly gets hit with an elbow. Jackie takes Molly down with some rights and a dropkick. Molly gets whipped into the ropes, and gets hit with a spinning back elbow for two. Three kicks to the midsection by Jackie, and she sets up for the Tornado DDT. Molly shoves out of it, and Jackie does a foward roll for no reason. I thought she was going for a Monkey flip, but instead, opts for the TEN PUNCHES OF DOOM! Molly gets up and whips Jacqueline, but Jacqueline hits a spin kick for the win. GAH, why must they push someone as useless as Jacqueline by putting her over quite possibly the best female wrestler in the company?
*
BUT WAIT! THERE�S MORE!
Here comes Raven. He�s got THE STICK in his hand, and he�s here to talk about his masterpiece. Raven gets some pretty damn good heat from the crowd. Raven talks about what he did to �Mike� two weeks ago. Raven says everyone is hiding behind a mask of hypocreaceae, including Jacqueline herself. Raven says he�s saved �Mike.� Raven says he can sense that Jacqueline is a little uncomfortable being so close to Raven. He says he can smell the sin all over her. Raven calls Jacqueline a gorgeous woman (Oh god). Raven asks if pride is what makes her dresses like a $2 tramp. Raven says he�s Jacqueline�s savior. The Hurricane runs down to make the save! Hurricane grabs THE STICK and calls Raven a psycho. HOLY BRAINSTORM, Hurricane wants a match with Raven, and it'll happen NEXT, after these words from our sponsors.
Uh, the REAL Main Event: Hurricane vs. Raven
Raven sprints to the ring, and Hurricane beats the hell out of him with rights and lefts, and a neckbreaker. More brawling, and the 10 PUNCHES OF DOOM, which Raven gets out of at about 5. Whip by Hurricane, but Raven slides to the outside. Vaulting body press to the outside by Hurricane, and he�s got the crowd into this one. Hurricane climbs to the top, but Raven knocks him off, and knees him through the ropes to the outside. Back in the ring, Hurricane gains the advantage again with a clothesline and a neckbreaker off the top rope for two. Irish whip by Hurricane, but he telegraphs it and Raven kicks him in the the midsection. Raven goes off the ropes, but gets taken down with a drop toehold. SHINING WIZARD for two. Could we see the Vertebreaker this week? Raven goes for a clothesline, but Hurricane ducks and tries for the Hurrichokeslam, but Raven elbows out and locks him in a front facelock. Raven tries for the Raven Effect, but Hurricane fights out of it and hits the Eye of the Hurricane for the win. Pretty much a squash for Hurricane.
*
Overall:
Not a bad show at all this week. It�s nice to have guys like Al Snow, Tommy Dreamer and The Hurricane on to keep things somewhat interesting. Scoot Andrews and Michael Shayne were very impressive this week. Hopefully WWE took note of that.
Have a good holiday!
Peter "FakeRazor" Ramon
As always, you can reach me here.
whacked Out wrestling
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