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The Dames' Diatribe on WWE No Mercy 2003
Posted by The Dames on Oct 21, 2003, 05:30
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The Dames� Diatribe on WWE No Mercy 2003
Pardon the lateness once again as my sleeping pattern has been extremely off course ever since I spent last Thursday staying up late to celebrate my Yankees going on to the World Series after watching what I consider to be one of the best games of all time. I do have to give it to you guys though�The Red Sox are a very, very good team and they gave us everything they had and more.
Well�no more chit chat, let�s go to it.
The PPV starts with a video package on what else�McMahon vs. McMahon. WWE is so good at production it makes this match seem like the most important match�.EVER. Then again, they probably would have sold it that way regardless of how good their production values are. The video package then transitions into one for Brock vs. Undertaker and we�re on our way with the start of the event which kicks off with a Cruiserweight Title.
Rey Mysterio vs. Tajiri for the WWE Cruiserweight Title
Match Background: Rey Mysterio took on Tajiri over a month ago and defeated him clean. Known traditionally as a man of sportsmanship, Tajiri offered Rey a handshake, but blasted him in the head with a roundhouse kick instead. Tajiri took on Rey again in a tag team match, getting the pinfall on the Cruiserweight champion and establishing himself as the #1 contender. Rey then took on Tajiri again, one on one for the Cruiserweight Title, only to lose the title to him after getting sprayed in the face with green mist. A rematch was announced for No Mercy, but on the way to the event, Tajiri took on the Ultimo Dragon on Smackdown, defeating him in a match that lasted less than 4 minutes. WWE are misusing Ultimo Dragon to the nth degree and that�s proof right there.
Anyway, after the match, Rey made the save and he goes after the champion to regain his title tonight.
The Match: Before the bell rings, Michael Cole and Tazz prove why they�re infinitely better than J.R. & The King as commentators right now, discussing what Rey needs to do to win the match and what Tajiri must do to retain. In a nice touch, the referee checks Tajiri�s mouth to see if he�s hiding any mist of any sort.
We�re underway now with Rey moving out of the way out of a Tajiri kick before locking up with him. Both men end up spilling to the outside, but rush back in where they get into a shoving match�which turns into a striking match with Rey and Tajiri both going for kicks early. Once again, they lock up but Rey gets the early advantage and goes after the legs of the Champion, trying to wear down the legs to prevent the kicks. Both men work the mat, reversing holds until Tajiri gains the advantage by working the arm and shoulder. Tajiri connects with some chops to the chest, but Rey is able to maneuver himself into a successful armdrag and a dropkick to the knee. Tajiri gets up and goes for the handspring elbow, but Rey has it scouted, dropkicking Tajiri in the back and causing the champion to fall to the outside. Rey leaps over the top to the outside onto Tajiri and end up back in the ring, where Rey looks to come off of the top in the ring�only for Tajiri to pull his arm down across the ropes.
Tajiri begins working on the arm, posting Rey shoulder first on the outside before getting a nearfall. He goes after the arm once again as Rey tries to retreat�but Tajiri unleashes a large kick to the arm in the corner. Rey counters with an armdrag and tries for a rana, but his arm is too hurt, allowing Tajiri to capitalize with a pair of hard kicks that draw a reaction from the crowd. Tajiri once again works on the arm with a reverse armbar as the crowd begins to stir to try and get Rey going, but Tajiri continues to beat on the arm with kicks. Tajiri sends Rey into the turnbuckle shoulder first and then decides to charge at him, but EATS BOOT, giving Rey some breathing room. Rey climbs to the top, only to get kicked in the back of the head by the champ who climbs to the top with him. Rey fights Tajiri off and knocks him down, coming off the ropes with a Tornado DDT and getting a nearfall from it, resulting in both men being down.
They both get up with Rey hitting a springboard cross body for a two count and following it up with a crucifix for two. Tajiri catapults Rey up and over the top, but Rey lands on the apron and sends Tajiri to the outside with a head scissors. Rey jumps off of the apron, landing a rana on the outside as once again, both men are down on the outside as the ref counts.
Rey sends the champion back in and springboards back in with Tajiri moving out of the way and landing a kick to the midsection. Tajiri looks to toss Rey to the outside, but Rey hits the 619 on Tajiri�s midsection for a pop! Rey sets himself up for the West Coast Pop, but Tajiri catches him and NAILS a powerbomb for ONE�TWO�NO! Tajiri elevates Rey over his head onto the turnbuckles, but Rey gains his balance and moonsaults onto the champion for a nearfall of his own! Tajiri gets up and nails a hard kick to Rey�s back to take over and hooks on the Tarantula in the corner. Tajiri then goes for the big kick to the back of the head, but Rey ducks it, rolls him up and connects with a basement dropkick. Rey then catapults Tajiri onto the ropes and hits the 619, setting up the West Coast Pop again, but this time it hits! ONE�TWO�??
Someone runs in, although it doesn�t appear to be a wrestler at first glance and security is all over him, so it could have been a fan. As the ref is distracted, Rey looks on as well and gets kicked in the back of the head by Tajiri to retain his title.
Winner: Tajiri
After the match, the replay shows that there were two people that jumped the guardrail, but only one made it into the ring and were seemingly well dressed. These guys could have been the rumored wrestlers coming in for the upcoming Japanese Mafia gimmick. If it was truly a fan run in, they wouldn�t have focused on it during the replay and it sure as hell wouldn�t have factored into the finish.
My Opinion: This was a decent match, not as good as the Smackdown match where Tajiri won the title, however. It started off slow and sped up nicely leading to believable nearfalls before the odd finish. The psychology seemed to be all over the place as the arm work didn�t exactly go anywhere and Rey�s targeting of Tajiri�s legs were pretty much ignored. **1/2
In the backstage area, Josh Matthews catches up with Vince McMahon and asks him how he�s feeling on facing Stephanie McMahon tonight. Vince berates Josh for such a stupid question and sells how personal this match is to him, as well as being business. He states that because he knows that people don�t exactly see eye to eye with him on this match, he�s making the stipulation that should anyone from any wrestling company anywhere interfere in the Vince vs. Steph match, he�ll make sure that they�ll never work anywhere again. Vince intimidates Josh before he leaves just for the fun of it.
We go to a tale of the tape for tonight�s WWE Title match�even though it would make more sense for this to be done before the main event.
A-Train vs. Chris Benoit
Match Background: Every time that A-Train has faced Chris Benoit, he�s apparently lost to him (although I�m not sure if that�s really true). A-Train became very frustrated about this and stated plainly that because he�s a bigger man, he�ll prove that he can beat him. He came into the arena and challenged anyone in the building to take him on, but ended up taking the time keeper, throwing him into the ring and locking on Chris Benoit�s submission finishing hold, the Crippler Crossface. This naturally brought out Benoit to make the save for the timekeeper, but instead, he was blasted in the face by Train with a steel chair and ended up getting laid out. A-Train then faced Chris Benoit in a 6 man tag team match which saw Benoit get pinned by the big man and have his own hold applied to him after the match. Once again, Train attacked Benoit after a match that Benoit had with Charlie Haas, looking to prove a point heading into tonight�s card.
The Match: This match seemingly has more heat that the Cruiserweight Title match prior to it for some reason. A-Train and Benoit lock up with Train overpowering Benoit in the corner, causing Benoit to fight back, only to be knocked down to the mat with a hard shoulder block. Benoit bails and Train shows his power again as Benoit comes in, only to be tossed outside again. A �Shave Your Back� chant heats up as Benoit comes in again and Train goes after him, only for Benoit to duck him and hit a big chop to his hairy chest. Benoit looks for a German Suplex, but Train blocks it, so Benoit looks for a Crossface attempt, which is blocked as well. Train overpowers Benoit into the corner, but Benoit comes out of it swinging�only to get knocked down again.
A-Train goes for an elbow drop, but Benoit moves out of the way. Train once again powers over Benoit into the corner, but Benoit won�t stop fighting back, trading blows with him. Train takes over with power maneuvers and hits a big splash on Benoit for a two count before connecting with an uppercut on the Wolverine. He goes after Benoit again, but eats a drop toe hold into the corner, allowing Benoit to get up. He charges, but Train hits a scissors kick for a nearfall before both men begin brawling again. Train shoves Benoit into the corner chest first and goes after his neck (which Tazz points out was surgically repaired) before pounding at Benoit�s head. Train hits the Decapitator on Benoit, focusing on the neck, but Benoit keeps fighting while on his back. Train completely dominates him for a moment as Benoit�s nose is busted open and smacks him around. Train picks up Benoit for a double underhook suplex�but ends up dropping Benoit down with a double underhook shoulder breaker! Benoit, bleeding from the mouth, puts his foot on the ropes to avoid getting pinned from that one.
Train gets methodical on Benoit now with his offense, but a distraction by the ref allows Benoit to fight back, only to get knocked down by an old school Polish Hammer. Train puts on a surfboard stretch and the fans cheer on Benoit to get up. Benoit does and hits a desperation DDT and both men are down! Both men get up and Benoit goes for a German suplex, but Train blocks it and hits a big one of his own! Train tosses Benoit to the outside, where he drives him into the guard rail back first before tossing him back into the ring. He goes to the ringside area and brings a chair into the ring, but Benoit fights back and Train drops the chair. Train regains his composure and lifts Benoit up in a press slam�.but Train loses hold of him and Benoit falls HEAD AND NECK FIRST ONTO THE CHAIR! BENOIT IS FUCKING DEAD!
Both the referee and Train immediately smother him to see if he�s ok and he apparently is as the match continues with Train going for a choke. Train takes the chair and wedges it into the corner as Benoit gets up and fights back again. Train whips him into the ropes and Benoit rolls up Train�transitioning it into THE CROSSFACE~! The fans are going crazy, looking for the tap out, but Train stands up while in the hold, so Benoit hits the Rolling Germans! Benoit signals for the Headbutt, but Train pops up and pulls him off of the top rope. Train then signals for the end and begins climbing the top rope for some reason. Benoit begins to stir, so Train gets down and hits the Derailer on him for ONE�TWO�NO! Benoit retreats into the corner where the chair is wedged and Train charges at him with a big kick�but Benoit gets out of the way and Train�s leg gets caught in the chair! Benoit hits a dragon screw leg whip�and struggles a bit but puts on the SHARPSHOOTER~! A-Train taps out and the crowd reacts big time for Benoit�s victory!
Winner: Chris Benoit
Upon a replay of the spot, a piece of the chair actually breaks off as Benoit�s head makes impact with it�.and it�s a miracle that Benoit wasn�t seriously hurt and was still able to finish the match.
My Opinion: This was a really good match between these two that I really wasn�t expecting. They did a good job playing to A-Train�s strengths as a power wrestler, overpowering and dominating Benoit at various points in the match up. Equally as effective was Benoit�s refusal to stop fighting back and the fact that Benoit had to use his quickness, outthink and outwrestle A-Train was excellent. The Sharpshooter was not only a nice tribute to the late Stu Hart, but it establishes the move as Benoit�s new secondary finisher and told a good story in the ring as Benoit realized that the Crossface wasn�t going to the get the job done. It also shows that Benoit will not necessarily lose to a bigger man and puts him over, which is what the majority of the storyline of the match was going into it. The pacing was pretty quick to being with and hit a steady crescendo by its climax as the crowd really got into the latter stages of the match. This was probably the best one on one match that I�ve seen A-Train involved in and a nice carry job by Benoit, even though A-Train almost killed the man with the botched press slam. ***
In the back, Matt Hardy is looking for Shannon Moore to accompany him to the ring, but he sees John Heidenriech choking out Moore in the back. Hardy comes to Moore�s defense and John H explains that �Little Johnny� told him that Matt Hardy threw out his try out tape, the one that was to be delivered to Stephanie McMahon. Hardy backtracks as he claims that the tape was full of highlights of Shannon Moore matches and NOT his try out�but he does have his try out tape and he�ll give it to �the new GM, whoever it may be�. John H believes him�but warns him that �little Johnny� will not be happy if he doesn�t come through.
So, John H is going to GM�s of both shows to get a job, huh? Put him on Raw�they need all the help they can get. As for �little Johnny�, I bet he�s bigger than the already large John Heidenreich. By the way�did anyone catch Matt Hardy give away the ending to the Steph vs. Vince match? If I did, I�m sure you can bet WWE management did.
A funny ad for Survivor Series airs next as a football team goes to the field only to find out that they�re facing WWE superstars. The commercial ends with Vince McMahon in his limo looking on and saying��The WWE and football? Nah�. It�s awesome that the company can make fun of themselves�but Vince needs to be able to see today�s current problems and worry about those instead.
The ring announcer, Tony Chimel, points out all of the military men in uniform who are in attendance and are going back to Iraq tomorrow. They get a standing ovation as we head into the next match.
Matt Hardy vs. Zach Gowen
Match Background: Prior to this year�s SummerSlam event, Matt Hardy was very vocal about the fact that Zach Gowen became a member of WWE�s locker room. He claimed that Zach was nothing more than a novelty act, generating heat based on sympathy and he�s taking spots that most people would kill for just because he has one leg. Basically, he�s been echoing the sentiments of most smarks and some marks out there�.and he�s the heel.
Anyway, after one of Zach�s first matches on Smackdown, Matt Hardy (who was doing color commentary on the match) ran in for a post-match attack on Gowen and a match was scheduled between the two for SummerSlam. The week prior to the event, Gowen was decimated by Brock Lesnar and would be out with an injury for a few months, so the match at SummerSlam between himself and Matt Hardy was canceled. Check this though�on the back of the SummerSlam DVD, the match listing still advertises Matt vs. Zach. How�s that for false advertisement?
On the Heat prior to SummerSlam, Matt Hardy was declared the victor by forfeit�and hasn�t done much of anything since. Zach Gowen returned to Smackdown recently and faced Shannon Moore in a match, coming out the loser due to Matt Hardy�s interference. Hardy and Zach will finally lock up tonight at No Mercy.
The Match: Today�s Matt facts are: �Matt Can Not Be Grossed Out�, which he proved when he ate a drank a blend of nasty stuff on Fear Factor two years ago. The second is �Matt Has Survived Five Car Wrecks�, which completely makes me question his driving skills�.
At the start of the match up, Hardy drives Gowen into the corner and slaps him, but Gowen fights back and hits a leg lariat and a spinning wheel kick. Hardy picks Zach up and slaps him down declaring himself �V 1 AHHH��as he and Tazz seem to be trying to get that over as a catchphrase. Gowen gets up and perches himself on the top, hitting a bulldog on Hardy for two. Gowen goes to use the 2nd rope to spring himself off of, but Moore pulls it down and Gowen takes a NASTY bump. Hardy goes on the attack again and hits him with some hard chops in the corner before connecting with a running clothesline. Hardy hits snake eyes and turns Gowen inside out with a hard clothesline for a nearfall. Hardy hits a legdrop and then mocks getting pinned by Gowen, showing how much he underestimates the one legged wrestler. Hardy hits a nice vertical suplex and puts on a surfboard stretch, but Gowen gets up, only to be knocked down again. Gowen pulls Hardy by his shorts into the turnbuckles, but Hardy isn�t weakened at all by it and looks for a moonsault off the top. Gowen moves out of the way and Hardy misses big time, giving Gowen an opening. He hits a dropkick on him, sending Hardy to the outside and then Gowen hits a SOMERSAULT to the outside onto him!
Back in the ring now, Gowen hits a cross body on Hardy for two�but Hardy pops up and hits a HUGE Side Effect for a two count. Gowen gets up and perches himself on the top rope, only to get crotched and Hardy gets behind him for a back suplex. Gowen fights back with a back elbow, knocking Matt Hardy down and then he moonsaults onto him for the pinfall!
Winner: Zach Gowen
My Opinion: The fact that Matt Hardy�s character was stalled due to Gowen�s absence was bad enough, but now, he�s got the stigma of losing to the one-legged wrestler and that doesn�t do him any favors. If Gowen wasn�t able to beat Shannon Moore, then Matt Hardy should not have lost to him at all. The finish was completely unbelievable as well as Gowen only weighs about 150, so his moonsault really shouldn�t have put Hardy away. When Gowen pinned the Big Show with it, it was only immediately after an F5 AND an Angle Slam. This wasn�t much of a match as Gowen mostly got fluke offense until the clean pinfall which shouldn�t have happened. *
Backstage, Vince McMahon is in his dressing room when he�s confronted by his wife, Linda. Linda makes one last plea to stop the father vs. daughter match. He tries to make her happy my adding a stip that he can only win by submission, where as Stephanie can win by either pinfall or submission. He then declares that the match is a No Holds Barred match�.
APA vs. The Basham Brothers
Match Background: For months, Bradshaw continued to insult the Basham Brother�s valet (and part time dominatrix) Shaniqua, leading to matches with the Basham Brothers. Most, if not all of the matches between the two teams ended up in the Bashams favor due to the interference of Shaniqua, who despite being female, happens to be a powerful force.
In a match last month, Bradshaw hit the Clothesline from Hell in the ring on Shaniqua, taking her out of action. Obviously, the Bashams were distraught about this and attacked the APA from behind with chairshots the following week, leading to Farrooq being taken to the back by medical personnel. The Basham Brothers made the challenge for this match on Sunday Night Heat and the APA accepted it.
The Match: Bradshaw locks up with Doug Basham and just starts with his usual clubberin� offense and knocks Basham down with a big shoulder block before tagging in Farrooq. Farrooq knocks Basham down for a nearfall and hits a powerslam for two. Danny Basham comes in and gets a drop toe hold by the veteran before Bradshaw comes in to help his partner hit a double spinebuster on him. A double shoulder block leads to a second nearfall, which is broken up by Bashams partner. Danny takes over with a jawbreaker and tags in his brother, who looks for a splash, but eats Farrooq�s knees in his midsection. He�s thrown to the outside where Bradshaw works him over before tossing him out. Farrooq looks for the Dominator, but Basham slips out and Doug comes in for a double back suplex.
They start working over Farrooq in the corner, hitting a double vertical suplex for a nearfall. They get a cheap shot into Bradshaw, pissing him off and allowing them to double team Farrooq some more. The crowd chants for the APA as Farrooq is in a reverse chinlock, but he powers out of it, only to get knocked down again. Danny Basham taunts Farrooq and comes off the ropes, only to get spinebustered. Farrooq tags in his partner, who goes after both men with clotheslines and he hits a huge powerbomb on Doug Basham for a nearfall.
The Bashams go after Bradshaw, but Doug gets caught in the Last Call. Danny perches himself on the top�but Bradshaw catches him and hits a 2nd rope Last Call for a broken up two count. The ref tries to remove the other Basham from the ring as Farrooq attempts a clothesline, knocking the referee down instead. Farrooq and one of the Bashams spill to the outside as Bradshaw gets up and hits the Clothesline from Hell�but all of a sudden, Shaniqua makes her return and comes into the ring, hitting Bradshaw in the back with a lead pipe. The Bashams cover and get the win off of it.
Winners: The Basham Brothers
My Opinion: This was mostly brawling for the most part and wasn�t very interesting at all until the last minute of the match. Even then, it didn�t steer from your usual tag team brawl. The Bashams get the win, but they really don�t get much of a rub from the APA, especially winning via interference. *1/4.
Backstage, Josh Matthews is with The Bashams and Shaniqua�who cuts a RIDICULOUS promo about her breasts, claiming that they�re permanently swollen because of the Clothesline from Hell. This was just about blatantly showing the world that she got breast implants, dwindling down the number of women in WWE without them.
Once again, Tazz and Michael Cole talk about the �Keys to Victory� for the Undertaker/Lesnar match. If you do this all prior to the main event�.it�ll mean something! NOT NOW!
A video package for Stephanie vs. Vince is shown, with pictures of Stephanie as a child with Vince interspersed in it. Yes, they even showed pre-breast implant Stephanie. The final shot of Vince�s eyes staring at the screen was just evil looking�and fucking awesome. But it�s going to take a hell of a lot more than that to make me care about this match.
Stephanie McMahon (w/Linda McMahon) vs. Vince McMahon (w/Sable) in a No Holds Barred I Quit Match
Match Background: Last year in the summer time, Vince McMahon hired General Managers for his now split roster with one of them taking over Raw and the other taking over Smackdown. Vince declared his daughter Stephanie the GM of Smackdown and for the most part, left her to her own devices for almost a year.
Then, Stephanie began making some questionable decisions according to her father, such as signing Mr. America (Hulk Hogan under a mask) and supporting the signing of Zach Gowen, which her father was dead against. It was obvious that Vince became more and more unhappy with Stephanie as GM and placed his �lover� Sable as Steph�s assistant. A match took place between the two women at Vengeance with Sable coming out on top as A-Train was hired by Vince McMahon to make sure that his daughter lost the match.
Vince was now determined to make his daughter quit the GM position, opting to force her out than fire her due to his massive ego. He booked her in matches against both A-Train and Brock Lesnar, but Stephanie still would not renege. She continued to defy her father�s authority, signing a WWE Title match between Brock Lesnar and the Undertaker for No Mercy and to Vince, this was the straw that broke the camels back.
He told Stephanie that if she didn�t take back that match up, then he would challenge her in a one on one match at No Mercy. Stephanie was insistent that the main event should take place, so Vince made the match an I Quit match, with Stephanie�s tenure as GM on the line.
With the McMahon family already starting to splinter apart, Linda McMahon, Vince�s wife and Stephanie�s mother, came to the ring to try and plead with her husband not to have this match with their daughter. Vince instead came to the ring with Sable and told his wife that he�d be willing to put up his position as Chairman of the Board in the match against Stephanie. Linda then told him that she would be supporting her daughter at No Mercy, so Sable declared her support for Vince and attacked Linda. This prompted Stephanie to attack and Vince ended up clotheslining and bodyslamming his own daughter to protect Sable. This broke his daughter�s heart as she reluctantly has to step into the ring with her own father at No Mercy.
The loser will have to leave their position in the company�but don�t think that you won�t see these people again. Both Stephanie and Vince have lost numerous matches where they were never supposed to come back�only to return a few weeks or months down the line.
For those of you who aren�t �in the know�, Stephanie is getting married to her real life boyfriend Triple H and going on a honeymoon very soon, so the odds are that Vince McMahon will be taking this match here tonight.
The Match: Every time Vince wrestles, I�m in pure awe at how good a shape he�s in for his age. I�m also in awe that this is the 3rd PPV that Vince McMahon has wrestled in this year, the 2nd for Stephanie and Survivor Series will be the 2nd for Shane.
Linda confronts Vince in the ring when he arrives, but as Stephanie escorts her mom out, Vince clubs her from behind. Stephanie jumps on his back, screaming like a banshee, but Vince just pulls her off. Steph looks to run away, but Vince won�t allow her, so she crawls through his legs. She kicks him into the corner, only for Vince to shoulder block her down to a chorus of boos.
He picks her up and whips her across the ring by her hair twice. He picks her up and shoves her into the corner, driving his shoulder into her several times. He hits some knees to the midsection as Michael Cole is PISSED OFF about his action. Sable slaps Steph as the ref admonishes Vince, prompting Linda to chase her around the ring, until Vince gets in her way. All of a sudden, Stephanie comes FLYING off the top with a SOMERSAULT TOPE CON HILO!
Just kidding.
She just lays there until Vince comes back in to a HUGE �Asshole� chant and Steph kicks away at him. Vince grabs her leg and clotheslines her down before hooking on a single leg crab. Stephanie sells it by screaming like she�s in labor, no shit. Vince puts her in a surfboard stretch before switching it into a choke. Stephanie pathetically bites her father to get him away and Sable goes under the ring to get a lead pipe before jumping up onto the apron. Linda comes around and pulls her down, beating on her until Vince pulls Linda onto the apron where she slaps him.
He turns around into a low blow by Stephanie and she takes the lead pipe and hits him low again. She rolls him up for a HUGE nearfall that most people bought out there! She picks the pipe up like she�s Sammy Sosa�but just can�t swing it as Vince wants mercy. He then charges at her, so she hits him with it in the midsection, then the back and face. She comes off the 2nd rope with it and gets another HUGE nearfall that this crowd is totally into.
Sable gets on the apron to argue with the ref, so Stephanie lunges at her. The ref is keeping them apart and Vince picks her up, but she slips away and shoves him into Sable, knocking her down onto the mat. She hits the most half assed bulldog I�ve ever seen and hooks the leg for another nearfall and this crowd is really into this match up. She once again picks up the lead pipe and charges at her�but Vince grabs her by the throat and shoves her down. He grabs the pipe and hits her in the midsection, causing the announcers to have a conniption. This leads to a HUGE �Asshole� chant and Vince takes the steel pipe and starts choking Steph out. She looks to pass out when Linda throws in the towel and the match is awarded to Vince.
Winner: Vince McMahon
After the match, Linda goes to check on Stephanie, only to get pie faced and shoved down by Vince, who proceeds to make out with Sable.
My Opinion: The ending reminded me of the Bret Hart/Bob Backlund �I Quit� match from Survivor Series �94�but about 100 times worse. There were family members at ringside, a loving mother threw in the towel and the babyface lost something very important to them as a result of it. That�s the extent to which I�ll compliment this match. The fact that this was the selling point of this pay per view makes me sick.
This match sets a horrible example for families everywhere, almost condoning domestic violence and adultery. Regardless of how the announcers sell it, both Stephanie and Vince are responsible for writing the shows and this is the shit that they come up with?
The actual match was terrible, as they�re both non-wrestlers and Stephanie has never hit a move correctly�ever, besides a slap. The only reason why the crowd was so enthusiastic about the match is because naturally, they make sure that they�re booked strong and dominate the TV time.
So, now that Stephanie has lost, she�ll be gone for a couple of months, but don�t fret�she�ll be back. Whether or not the fans will be is a different story. -***
After the match, Cole and Tazz play up the angle and talk about the fact that Smackdown no longer has a GM.
A video package for Cena vs. Angle plays prior to the match.
John Cena vs. Kurt Angle
Match Background: In the spring of 2002, John Cena made his WWE debut in a match against Kurt Angle, taking Angle to the limit and having most people believe that Cena was going on to great things in the ring, but it was evident later on that Angle was simply carrying him and doing a great job of it. After languishing in the lower midcard for a few months, Cena�s star began to rise after adopting a rap gimmick, which he had the skills and charisma to pull off and has been gaining pops over the last few months, despite being a heel.
Fast Forward to a couple of weeks ago, where Kurt Angle lost the WWE Title to Brock Lesnar in an Ironman Match which saw Lesnar go over by using tons of dirty tricks to gain the advantage. Angle, incensed about the way he lost his title, interrupted a ceremony that was hosted by Vince McMahon where the WWE Title would be presented to the new champion. Angle called out Lesnar, but Cena came out instead, looking to rub some salt into the wound of the man that just lost the title. Angle wasn�t in any mood for it and brawled with Cena immediately, disposing him and going to the backstage area to find the new champion. While he searched for Brock, Cena attacked Angle in the back and took off, with Angle giving chase.
In the next few weeks, Cena and Angle looked to one up each other with Cena pinning Angle in a tag match using his steel chain and Angle challenging Cena to a battle rap, only to take the opportunity to attack the young rapper. This past week on Smackdown, they tried to elevate their feud�with midgets.
Angle came to the ring dressed as John Cena and squared off against a mini-version of himself until Cena came running down to the ring for one last brawl before tonight�s match up.
The Match: Cena comes to the ring first and cuts his pre-match rap on Angle.
They lock up with Angle backing Cena up in the corner and giving him a clean break. A huge �Cena� chant actually breaks out in the crowd as they lock up again with Angle taking Cena down. Angle knocks Cena down, then hits a series of armdrags as the crowd actually battle with each other with LOUD dueling chants. �Lets Go Cena� vs. �Let�s Go Angle�.
Cena attacks with a boot to the midsection and gets a shoulder block, but gets hiptossed and armdragged again. Cena goes for a clothesline, which Angle ducks�and Angle gives him a double finger salute. This causes Cena to shove Angle, prompting a brawl, which Tazz claims is a smart move on the part of Cena.
Angle has the clear advantage in the brawl, but Cena connects HARD with a clothesline to take over and get the first nearfall as the dueling chants start again. Angle comes back and back body drops Cena for two and the announcers acknowledge the chants for Cena. Angle whips Cena into the corner and charges at him with a shoulder tackle that hits before going to work on him in the corner some more. Angle whips Cena into the turnbuckle again with Cena moving out of the way this time and Angle smacks his shoulder into the ring post, falling to the outside.
Cena throws Angle back in and clotheslines him down before going to the corner with a running clothesline. He hits a hangmans neckbreaker on Angle for a two count and puts the boots to him. Cena once again knocks Angle down with a clubbing blow and Angle�s bleeding out of the mouth. Angle fights out of a hold, only to be knocked down again and Cena hits the move formerly known as the Protoplex for a two count.
He hooks on a front face lock as the dueling chants start up again and Angle battles out with right hands. He charges at Cena again, only to receive a spinebuster for a two count. Cena goes to the top rope, but Angle pops up�only to get thrown off. Cena jumps off, but gets dropkicked in the leg by Angle! Cena sells the leg injury as Angle gets up and attacks with right hands. Angle comes off the ropes with forearms and a pair of clotheslines before hitting a Russian Leg Sweep for two. Cena charges at Angle�and Angle hits a drop toe hold, hooking on the Ankle lock and Cena makes it to the ropes, bailing to the outside. Angle follows Cena out with a baseball slide that connects and throws him back into the ring. Cena attacks Angle while on the apron and both men end up on it. Cena goes for a right hand and Angle ducks�and attempts a German suplex OFF THE APRON TO THE FLOOR! Thankfully, for Cena, he�s able to hang onto the ropes with both hands and hits a DDT on the apron onto Angle instead! Cena goes back into the ring, selling his bad leg as Angle is on the outside, recovering.
Angle gets up as the count gets to 8�but Cena legdrops Angle in the back of the head as he enters the ring! Cena drags Angle away from the ropes and gets a two count out of it. Angle gets up and hits the Rolling Germans, but Cena elbows out of it and hits a dropkick to the knee of Angle. He comes off the ropes and hits the Throwback on Angle for another two count. Cena tosses Angle into the corner, but gets rolled up for two and Angle once again goes for the Rolling Germans. He hits all three of them for a nearfall and both men are down.
Angle gets up first and goes after Cena�but Cena goes for a powerbomb on Angle. Angle holds onto Cena�s leg, preventing the move, so Cena lets go and knees Angle a couple of times before attempting it again. Angle once again blocks it�so Cena knees him again. Cena finally lifts Angle up and hits a Turnbuckle Powerbomb!
He drags Cena away from the ropes and goes for the cover again, only to get a two count. He declares that it�s over and goes for the FU�and HITS IT! ONE�TWO�NO!
Cena looks frustrated and looks for the FU again�but Angle flips over it and hits the Angle Slam! ONE�TWO�NO! The crowd starts chanting for Cena�as he grabs his steel chain and puts it into his right hand. He goes to punch Angle with it, but the referee sees it and takes it away. As he takes the chain away, he steals a page from Eddie Guerrero�s book and pulls out Angle�s gold medals from his pocket, which he probably stole when no one was looking and nails Angle in the face with it! He tosses them away�goes for the cover�ONE�TWO�NO!
Cena is HEATED and goes after Angle, but Angle counters with a backslide for two! Angle goes for the Angle Slam, but Cena slips out of it and goes for the FU! Angle turns it into a victory roll�.and transitions it into the Ankle Lock! Cena tries to get to the ropes, but he�s pulled back to the middle of the ring where Angle hooks on the full Heel Hook (ala Royal Rumble �03 & the Brock Ironman Match) getting the tap out victory!
Winner: Kurt Angle
My Opinion: This was a great match as they told a good story in the ring. The more inexperienced Cena tried to take out Angle anyway he could, growing more and more frustrated as the match went on, so he tried to cheat to win after the F5 didn�t work. Angle, the veteran, was able to withstand it all and although Cena kicked out of the Angle Slam, still had enough moves to put away the kid. The Heel Hook is over with the crowds to the point that once it�s slapped on, the crowd KNOWS that the match is done.
However, the real story to me was the big babyface reaction to John Cena. It looks like the crowd is ready to embrace him as the next big babyface and personally, I hope that WWE doesn�t make the mistake of turning him on Thursday. This is something that should be done gradually and if done correctly, he�ll be big. Cena needs to work on his in ring skills, but so far does the little things right, such as dragging his opponent to the middle of the ring to go for a cover. The guy already has the charisma and the right gimmick to make it work and hopefully, his work in the ring shall improve as well.
As for Angle, this was the right result tonight. Angle just left the main event scene and in order to kept as a serious main eventer (seeing as how he�s been shunted back and forth too many times) he simply cannot lose to any midcarders right now. This match helped Cena in a lot of ways and at the same time, got the Heel Hook over with a clean tap out, so hopefully, he�ll be moving on to another top tier program soon. This is the kind of matches WWE needs to put on in order to put over the younger talent. I just hope they don�t screw Cena up. ***1/4.
We go to footage of the Eddie/Show feud leading into the title match�
Eddie Guerrero vs. The Big Show for the US Title
Match Background: A few weeks ago, The Big Show was doing commentary for some unknown reason (he didn�t have a match scheduled on the show) and abruptly left before the match that was to take place in the ring was to begin. It was a US Title defense by Eddie Guerrero against Charlie Haas where Guerrero was coming into the match already at a disadvantage, having wrestled in a tag team match earlier in the show. Once again, for no apparent reason, Big Show attacked Eddie as he was walking past him down the aisle and then non-chalantly returned to the backstage area.
Guerrero was able to defend his title successfully that night and confronted The Big Show, accompanied by his tag team championship partner and nephew, Chavo Guerrero. It was there that Big Show told Eddie that he didn�t like him one bit and he did what he did�because he could. I�d say that�s just lazy writing, but that�s just me.
The Guerrero�s got a bit of revenge on Show by having their cousin stage as a delivery man, looking for Eddie and Chavo so he can bring them an order of burritos. The Guerrero�s, knowing that Big Show would steal and eat them, tampered with the burrito�s and Big Show ended up losing to Orlando Jordan via count out after his bowels realized what was going on and kicked in. As revenge for the burrito incident, Show attacked Eddie backstage in mid promo and went on to squash Orlando Jordan later on in the night. After his match, Chavo Guerrero tried to coax Show into a one on one match in order to defend Eddie�s honor, which Show accepted. The match consisted of Chavo running away from Show for about a minute before being counted out, seemingly on purpose. Afterwards, Eddie Guerrero drove a sewage truck into the ring, along with a large hose and ended up spraying Big Show with, well�shit.
The Big Show obviously didn�t care for being sprayed with caca, so he attacked Eddie from behind on Smackdown, destroying his low rider and bloodying Eddie�s back with the broken shards of glass. He powerbombed Eddie onto the hood and windshield and finished it off with a chokeslam on the roof of the car, causing tons of lacerations on Eddie�s back and arms, leading into tonight�s match up for the US Title.
The Match: Eddie does NOT drive to the ring tonight, walking down the aisle, staring at Show the whole time. Standing on the ramp, he turns to his side, brandishing his cuts and scrapes from the attack last Thursday, almost to say to Show �you did this to me�you will pay�.
He comes into the ring and immediately dropkicks Show in the knee, but Show overpowers Eddie and tosses him into the corner. He looks to chop him, but Eddie uses his speed and ducks out of the ring. He tries to pull Show out of the ring, but Show literally palms Eddie�s head and pulls him back onto the apron! Eddie drops down though, draping Show�s throat across the rope and the US Champ comes back in with right hands a blazin�. He comes off the ropes�and gets hit with a clothesline by Show, which is followed up with a headbutt. Show takes Eddie into the corner and hits a massive chop and a clubbing blow to the back, which Eddie sells like DEATH because of the injury he received last week at the hands of Show. Show steps on his back before clubbing on it again, but Eddie tries to fight back, only to get hit again. Show hits a massive chop to Eddie�s chest and whips him to the ropes, but Eddie stops, causing Show to give chase. Eddie trips Show over the ropes and he spills to the outside. Eddie goes under the ring and grabs a chair, tossing it into the ring. The ref, naturally, goes to take the chair away and while he does so, Eddie reaches under the ring, gets a trashcan lid and smacks Show in the head with it. Show has still not been knocked down by Guerrero, although Eddie has gotten the upper hand a few times.
Back in the ring now, Eddie goes after the giant with right hands, hops and kicks to the knee, but he still won�t go down. A funny moment occurs as a chop in the corner by Guerrero pisses Show off and Guerrero backs away immediately. Show goes after Eddie on the outside�and tosses him back first into the ring post. Show presses Eddie and throws him back into the ring�and then jumping onto his back before putting on a giant sized rear chin lock. He switches it into a double underhook submission to work on Eddie�s back before clubbing on it again.
Show places Eddie in the corner chest first�and chops his upper back with a LOUD SMACK�and Eddie is hurt. Eddie connects with some elbows, but gets put down again. Show removes the turnbuckle pad in the corner and whips him into it, hurting his back some more. Show starts audibly taunting Eddie as the champ struggles to get to his feet and places Eddie on the top rope. Eddie grabs Show�s head and rams it into the exposed turnbuckle pad while sitting on the top�and then comes flying off the top with a frog splash version of a cross body which FINALLY knocks Show down! ONE�TWO�NO! Show ends up tossing Eddie off of him onto the ref�.so Show goes for a legdrop! Eddie moves out of the way, but the poor ref is DEAD!
Show goes after Eddie again, but Eddie moves out of the corner. Eddie grabs some brass knucks from inside his tights�and punches Show in the head with it! Show goes down like a light and Eddie goes to wake up the ref! He goes for the cover�ONE�TWO�.NO!
Eddie then starts looking for another way to cheat and grabs his US Title. He goes into the ring and smacks Show in the face with it! Eddie is fired up and climbs to the top rope and nails the frog splash! He hooks the leg once again�ONE�TWO�.NO!
Eddie charges at Show, but gets a giant spinebuster for a nearfall! Show gets up and chokeslams Eddie! ONE�TWO�NO! Eddie got his foot on the ropes! Show declares that it is OVER�and goes for the chokeslam again, but Eddie hits a low blow and a DDT! Guerrero can�t capitalize though and both men are down. He goes for the cover and only gets a two count again. Eddie stuggles to his feet again�but Show grabs him by his throat as he gets up! Show chokeslams Eddie and immediately goes for the cover, getting the three count and the US Title.
Winner and New US Champion: The Big Show
After the match, Show celebrates with the title�and tries to put it on his waist to no avail as he�s way too big for it. In the ring, Eddie Guerrero is upset about losing his title and Chavo comes into the ring to console him. He tries to let him know that he�s still got another title (WWE Tag Title with Chavo), so he shouldn�t be TOO disappointed�
My Opinion: This was another match on the show that I felt told a story as Eddie had to overcome Show�s size, strength and his own injuries, but just couldn�t do it, even after employing his cheating ways. Show as booked effectively, using his strength and size to his advantage and actually pinpointing a body part and sticking to it. He even put on a back submission hold to weaken Eddie some more.
The US title on Show should be interesting, if nothing else than to see who he�ll be programmed with. Personally, I felt that Eddie needed to win that match to prove that he can beat bigger men and hopefully, he does get the victory the next time that these two meet in the ring. Eddie will probably move onto a Chavo feud from the looks of things and may be losing the tag titles soon. Hopefully, after all of this is said and done, he can be elevated past the US Division and inject some new life into the upper midcard or main event. **1/4.
In the back, Josh Matthews catches up with The Big Show and asks him about his US Title win. Show basically plays the �I told you so� card and states that no one�s going to take the US Title from him�
Brock Lesnar vs. The Undertaker in a Biker Chain Match for the WWE Title
Match Background: A few months ago, The Undertaker faced Kurt Angle in a match for the WWE Title that was going back and forth until Brock Lesnar came in and waffled both men with the championship title. Brock�s turn for a title shot came in an Ironman match and he defeated Angle for the championship. Earlier in the night, The Undertaker let Vince McMahon know that he wasn�t going to interfere in the Ironman Match because he has too much respect for the WWE Title to do so. I wonder where that respect was when he interfered in the Rock/HHH Ironman match for the WWE Title, costing the champion the title in the last valuable seconds�hmm?
The Undertaker let Brock know afterwards that his first title defense would be against him at No Mercy, which Lesnar obviously didn�t approve of. After attempting to use a steel chair on him, The Undertaker used a long biker chain in order to keep Brock at bay. He got permission from Stephanie McMahon to make the WWE Title match at No Mercy a Biker Chain match, which is new to wrestling fans. As The Undertaker was explaining the rules of the match, Brock attacked him backstage and used the chain to choke out Taker, only to get chokeslammed later on.
This isn�t the first time that Brock Lesnar and the Undertaker have battled for the WWE Title, having faced each other at last year�s Unforgiven and headlining last year�s No Mercy in a Hell in a Cell match. The heel Lesnar overcame the babyface Undertaker and the same dynamic is in play tonight.
The Match: This is basically a �steel chain on a pole� match, so I don�t exactly have high hopes for it.
Undertaker goes right after Lesnar, but Brock is on the defensive and ducks several clotheslines until driving his shoulder into UT�s midsection and working him over in the corner. UT fights back and goes after the arm, but Brock blocks it and hooks on a bear hug. They go into the corner where Brock connects with a series of knees and punches and whips him into the far corner. Brock charges, but UT moves out of with the way with Lesnar smacking the ring post shoulder first.
Taker starts working on the arm of Lesnar and looks to go for Old School, but Lesnar blocks it with strikes to the gut. An irish whip is reversed into a UT big boot and legdrop, but that only gets a two count. Taker goes for Old School again and hits it to a pop. Taker performs a Magistral cradle (!), which I�ve never seen him do and that gets a two count as well. The announcers talk about how UT hasn�t gotten too stale by adding to his repertoire over the years. They go to the outside where Brock gets the advantage again with repeated knees to the midsection and by whipping Taker into the steel steps with his knees hitting first.
Back in the ring, Lesnar continues to work over Taker as the pace of this match is too slow for me to enjoy. Brock fisherman suplexes Taker (!) for a two count, which Tazz calls a Perfect Plex and mentions Curt Hennig as a tribute. Taker ends up forcing Brock into a corner and charges at him with a big boot, but Lesnar moves out of the way and Taker rams his hamstring into the turnbuckle.
Taker goes to the outside and drapes Brock�s throat on the rope when he tries to pull him back in. Taker gets on the apron, but gets knocked off into the guard rail as Brock charges at him. They begin brawling again around ringside briefly, only to come back into the ring.
Taker comes back with a flying clothesline and gets a two count which no one really buys because the chain hasn�t come into play. Lesnar regains the momentum with a knee to the midsection�but Taker drops him onto the ropes. Taker looks to go for the chain�but all of a sudden, the lights go out!
When the lights come back on, sadly, there�s no one in the ring or anything, it was nothing more than a distraction. Lesnar hits a powerslam on Taker for a two count before going to the outside and getting the steel steps. He tosses them into the ring, but Taker�s back on his feet and he headbutts the champion several times. Taker goes to whip Lesnar into the steps, but Lesnar reverses it and drop toe holds Taker into the steps. Lesnar goes to knock Taker�s head into them again, but its blocked and Taker fights back. Taker clotheslines Brock over the top rope and instead of going for the chain, he follows him to the outside and piledrives Lesnar on the steel steps! Actually, it was a very bad looking spot as Brock�s head hit Taker�s legs and didn�t look like it was ANYWHERE near the steel steps.
Taker goes for the biker chain again, but Lesnar is able to stop him. Taker wraps his legs around Brock�s head�and puts on a head scissors which the announcers mistakenly call a triangle choke. Brock low blows Taker after being released from the hold and smacks him in the head with the steel steps that were in the ring. He goes for a few pinfall attempts and obviously Taker kicked out because this match isn�t over.
Lesnar goes to waffle him in the head with the steel steps again, but Taker boots them away. Taker then tosses the steps at Brock�but Lesnar ducks and the steps fall to the outside. Lesnar goes for his shoulder blocks in the corner again and goes after the biker chain himself. Taker gets up and goes for the Last Ride, but Lesnar slips out of it and shoves Taker to the ropes. Both men clothesline each other and end up down in the middle of the ring.
Taker gets up and starts �throwin� hands� at Brock, but it ends up as a back and forth slugfest. Taker gains the advantage and hits running clotheslines on him in the corner before hitting snake eyes on him and following it up with a big boot. He signals for the chokeslam, but Lesnar slips out of that and hits a spinebuster. Lesnar goes for the cover, but Taker hooks on the actual triangle choke (although MMA experts will tell you that Taker�s version sucks). Lesnar is able to lift UT off of the mat and powerbombs him down.
Lesnar knocks the champion down with a clothesline as the fans are visibly sitting on their hands and don�t seemingly care about the match. Lesnar looks to powerslam Brock, but UT slips out and puts on his dragon sleeper�but Brock counters that into the F5! He covers Undertaker, but UT gets his foot on the ropes. Brock now looks to go get the chain again, but Taker gets up�and chokeslams Lesnar off of the top rope! Instead of going for the pinfall, he decides to go for the chain, like an idiot.
As he gets there, Nunzio and the rest of the FBI come in to attack UT. UT is able to fight them off and Lesnar takes advantage by going for the F5. UT slips out of it and hits the Last Ride on him! Once again, UT doesn�t go for the cover�instead opting to go after the FBI with a SUICIDE DIVE TO THE OUTSIDE!
As UT goes back into the ring, Nunzio tries to get to the biker chain, but UT tosses him off, to the floor. Taker grabs the chain, FINALLY�but Vince McMahon comes from under the ring and shoves him off of the top rope! Lesnar grabs the chain, wraps it around his wrist�and punches UT in the head and scores the pinfall.
Winner: Brock Lesnar
My Opinion: This match was disappointing, but the fact that it was a Biker Chain match pretty much guaranteed it. These guys went about 15-20 minutes of mostly slow brawling with the only bright spot being some new moves used by both men. There weren�t any real believable falls because no one honestly would think that the match would end without the chain coming into play. Then there�s the lights going out for no reason�
Once again, Vince McMahon goes over more wrestlers as he does more damage than all 3 members of the FBI were able to and he helped Lesnar get the pinfall. Damn, I�m just glad this show is over. **
Overall: While the show didn�t exactly have a great card on paper going in, some of the matches made up for it, such as Cena/Angle and Benoit/A-Train, which I actually liked. This wasn�t as good a show as last year�s No Mercy which had the excellent Rey/Edge vs. Angle/Benoit tag team match and the best Brock/Undertaker encounter to date, the Hell in a Cell match. This was still infinitely better than the Raw PPV�s, but I�m sick of the McMahon�s taking up valuable time here.
Smackdown won�t get their own PPV again until February, so until then, I�d have to say that this was the worst of the two they�ve had this year so far. I would have to say that the bright spots on tonight�s broadcast would have to be the popularity of John Cena starting to manifest itself into babyface heat, Benoit going over strong and the decent storytelling that took place in a few of the matches. The definite low light would be the McMahon vs. McMahon match that no one really wanted to see anyway�
See you for Survivor Series.
�Til next time,
�The Dames�, Damian Gonzalez
Any questions, hate mail, fan mail, move clarifications, marriage proposals, job offers, hair style advice, lottery giveaways, compliments�send it all to [email protected] if you�re an AOL user or [email protected] if you�re not.
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