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" The Gravel Pit "
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WWE Judgment Day 2004
Posted by Nik Johnson on May 17, 2004, 17:52
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Coming into the show, Judgment Day was a mess. So why is Judgment Day looking so weak in comparison to Raw's Backlash?
First of all, Backlash had a major advantage, something that was initially seen as a negative. When Backlash rolled around, Wrestlemania was still fresh in people's minds, and WWE were able to run pretty much Wrestlemania part II. All of the main feuds were already established � the triple threat main event, Christian and Jericho, Foley and Orton. There was also the returning Edge, who was put into a throwaway feud with Kane that didn't burn up much airtime. Remember too, that Raw had lost several of their stars the night after Mania � Rob Van Dam and Booker T both went to SmackDown!, as did multiple time tag team champions the Dudleys. Stone Cold left the company, as did Goldberg.
Expectations for the show were low going in, but the matches that needed to deliver did so, with everything else being somewhat throwaway. Nothing was outright bad, apart from the so-important-it-wasn't-mentioned-until-they-started-coming-to-the-ring match between Hurricane, Rosey and La Resistance, and the underwhelming Edge and Kane encounter.
SmackDown! has had their share of losses on the roster, too � Brock Lesnar went off to crash motorbikes, and Kurt Angle took over as General Manager while awaiting further neck surgery. This left Guerrero without a credible main event heel to work with into Judgment Day, and was supposed to be one of the reasons behind the redraft on Raw. Rather than taking the logical route, and using the recently heel turned Booker T against Guerrero, Booker was thrown into a useless feud with the Undertaker (who has only appeared on-screen a few times since Wrestlemania), which is based on nothing, has no heat, and is going nowhere. But they did feature an unmarked grave, which is shocking, or exciting or something.
So Guerrero gets Bradshaw. At Wrestlemania, Bradshaw was in an awful four way tag match, with Ron Simmons. Now, Simmons has left the company, and the rush job was on. Turning Bradshaw heel, allying him with Kurt Angle (remember why he got the title shot in the first place?), tweaking his gimmick, and asking people to buy him in the main event. All of this was achieved within a month, but in the eyes of everyone: It's still fucking Bradshaw. He was useless with his singles push after the initial roster split in 2002, and he's still useless now. He offers nothing in the ring, but, credit where it is due � he is getting heat from his gimmick. Is it genuine heel heat, or X-Pac heat? I'm not sure, but I don�t think that a racist is the most adult of gimmicks that WWE could have given him.
The main problem I foresee with Booker T vs. the Undertaker is that Taker will make T look like a bitch. There's no two ways around it. Taker will slowly no-sell his way through another painful encounter, until Booker T is forced to sell the Tombstone as though he's in a coma. This will damage Booker, giving him yet ANOTHER loss against WWE main event talent, adding the Undertaker to the list currently comprising of the Rock, Triple H, Stone Cold and Kurt Angle. Booker is just fulfilling the role that was originally for Brock Lesnar, which was one of the reasons that Lesnar cited when leaving. But OMG IT'S TEH DEADMAN~! This is justification enough for him to be beating T in 2 minutes at house shows.
Other than that, there's no shape to the card at all � Cena vs. Dupree is another thrown together job between an increasingly stale character and the hot new thing on the block. It�s rematchosity, as RVD and Rey re-take on the Dudleyz, and Chavo takes on Jackie, both of which have already been seen on SmackDown in recent weeks. Oh, and Billy Gunn and Hardcore Holly (�wow, he�s still around?� � Eric Bischoff, almost 10 years ago.) Mordecai, complete with silly gimmick debuts, but I�m not expecting much � as the Observer reports, �Kevin "Mordecai" Fertig has been told to sell a lot less than he's been doing, and to concentrate on beating people up as opposed to having a good match.�
The show is just directionless, as a direct result of not being able to continue their Wrestlemania storylines and having to come up with totally new matches right across the board.
One final comment, as Bradshaw appeared on wwe.com, saying:
I am in the best wrestling shape I have been in in years. If we go a half an hour, I will be ready. For those of you fat, out-of-shape Internet wannabes who have never done anything more athletic than play checkers, kiss my ass for doubting me, and realize why you hate me. I was the guy in school who made you do my homework and locked you in your locker.
If we go a half an hour, I will be ready.
With that said, on with the show...
Rey Mysterio & RVD vs. The Dudley Boyz
The Dudleys come out to complete silence, and spend the whole match trying to compensate for that by bringing out every single cheap tag team move in the book. I hate the �partners switch without tagging� deal. It�s not like they are being enormously clever and getting one over on the referee. Anyway, an early heat section on RVD doesn�t get anywhere, and he doesn�t sell the pain in the slightest. The crowd are really into RVD, which is a good sign after the time he spent on Raw. Mysterio comes in and falls into the CW vs. non-CW trap, and immediately takes a beating from both Dudleys. The match isn�t allowed to go anywhere, and Mysterio hits a hugely contrived, 619 on both Dudleys, allowing Van Dam the 5* for the win. The crowd don�t care about the Dudz any more, especially not as heels, and the ending came from nowhere, as Rey popped up from almost dead to running around in seconds.
Torrie Wilson vs. Dawn Marie
Angle comes out before the match and informs us that Torrie will be fired if she loses. This takes him way, WAY too long to get to, and isn�t important anyway. The match opens with a drawn out bunch of choking, then a couple of snapmares, and a dropkick. It�s like watching fuckin� Tough Enough. Torrie doesn�t react once to the �you�re fired� stipulation, and I�m wondering why they bothered leaving it to the last minute, instead of building up to it. Dawn Marie tries to get Torrie counted out, which isn�t explained, and seems to have no logic behind it. Dawn�s pants break, revealing her ass, and she�s not sure what to do with it, leading to a bit of stalling � jut what the match needed. Torrie comes in with a backslide to win and keep her job. So I have to ask � why the stipulation? It wasn�t mentioned before the show, so there was no buyrate related reason. The match was already announced on wwe.com, so it wasn�t to justify the match. The match was wrestled exactly the same as every other time Torrie has been out there, so it didn�t change anything during the match. Asinine.
Mordecai vs. ???
Scotty 2 Hotty is job boy du jour, as Michael Cole tells us he�s been �interested in Scotty�s opponent for a while�. Mordecai (who�s name will always sound stupid) comes out to some peaceful, serene music, which contrasts with his demeanour within the ring. The crowd sit on their hands as he comes out, something that seems to happen a lot tonight. He immediately goes for Scotty�s shoulder, wrapping his arm around the ringpost. Some extremely slow paced, but INTENSE~! blows from Mordecai have Scotty bumping like a bitch. The crowd don�t seem to know what to make of Mordecai. Scotty tries a comeback, but Mordecai gives him nothing. Pre-worm bulldog is completely no-sold (finally!), and the Razor�s Edge finishes in short order. Another throwaway match in a series of them tonight.
Tag Titles: Rico & Haas vs. Billy Gunn & Hardcore Holly
Rico�s super gayness works in his favour, as neither Gunn nor Holly want to touch him. Cue the tag to Haas, and both guys are willing to fight. The crowd aren�t behind anyone, and I�m unsure who the faces actually are � Hardcore Holly cheats repeatedly, but Rico is heel under the �gay = bad� rule. As the match progresses into a series of punches and kicks, Gunn forgets he doesn�t want to touch Rico, and has no problem punching him. Rico�s hilarity continues with a whole bunch of silly things � a simulated blow job and anal sex just eliciting a minor laugh from the crowd (and a huge laugh from Michael Cole.) The gayness / scared of gayness doesn�t go anywhere, as Rico and Haas easily win. Brutally boring match, all punchy kicky, with a few silly gay jokes thrown in for good measure.
CW Title: Chavo Guerrero vs. Jacqueline
I have to wonder why they�d put Chavo�s arm behind his back. It inhibits the quality of the match before it even starts, something that he doesn�t need when working with someone like Jacqueline. I don�t understand why WWE has to humiliate the heels all the time � in the past, it was always the case that the face would be humiliated and then have a quest for revenge. This led to long and interesting storylines. Now though, the heel gets humiliated (like, say, Molly at WM) and then everyone has big laughs. The end.
Chavo�s arm is clearly not tied down, and he�s only holding the rope in place. He works well with the lack of one arm though, holding onto a backbreaker and turning it into multiples. He clearly outclasses Jacqueline all through the match, until she goes for the low blow (harking back to their SmackDown! match). Chavo unties the arm, while Chavo Classic attempts to use the chair, belt and god knows what else. I don�t see why they need to cheat � Chavo is clearly all over Jackie. Chavo wins, but Cole plays it up as �lucky�, �cheating� and so on. Why the hell couldn�t he have a decisive win, especially after being played as the stronger man all through the match.
US Title: John Cena vs. Rene Dupree
It should be noted that by this point, the video packages for every match were getting so long and tedious that I stopped watching them.
The crowd finally wake up for Cena, but the match is enough to put them back down. A load of punching and kicking take up the first part of the match, until Rene starts to work the back of Cena. A backbreaker is followed up with a bearhug, which is a sound, if BORING strategy. However, two minutes later, when Cena is on offence, the back work is forgotten. More generic brawling, which the crowd gets into, since it�s Cena, and the FU finishes. Dull match, with no story, just a bunch of brawling and ineffective back work. Cena wastes a bunch of time giving out a Lakers shirt to someone in the crowd.
Booker T vs. The Undertaker
Now THIS is what I need to wake me up. Booker T has some powder in a bag, which is some silly good luck charm. The Undertaker punches T in the face, and he drops like he�s been shot, having to leave the ring to regroup. But when Taker is kicked in the face, he only recoils slightly. I�d like to emphasise the absolute lack of wrestling holds here, as Booker kicks, throws and pounds on the Undertaker�s legs. The bag of dirt that Booker T brought to the ring, was repeatedly shown on camera, and made a big deal of, was thrown into Taker�s eyes, and he NO SOLD IT. Why go to the effort of making it seem important, and then throwing it away? Scissors kick from Booker is also no-sold, immediately going into the Zombie Sit-up, chokeslam and Tombstone finish while Booker plays dead for the next 10 minutes. Everything that was built up about Booker T was no-sold; the scissors kick, the leg work, and the powder. Complete burial.
Eddie Guerrero vs. Bradshaw
Even after seeing the match, I can�t believe this was a PPV main event. Wow. Eddie slaps hands on the way to the ring, then locks eyes with Bradshaw, and his expression completely turns. Eddie is angry as hell, and shows it by taking it out on Bradshaw, attacking him with everything he can find. Bradshaw�s offence is much slower, working a long, looong headlock for no discernable reason, other than him being blown up already. He finally shows some sadism by hitting Eddie with the fallaway-slam on the outside, and trying to put him through the table. The crowd get behind Eddie, and even (I can�t believe this) put some heat on Bradshaw. All of the brawling is the same as everything we�ve seen so far tonight, and while it works in the context of the match (�fuck wrestling, he hurt my mom�), after two straight hours of it, it�s getting a little stale. The lack of weapon shots and blood up until this point did help though, making both seem more important. Eddie�s cut was deep as hell, and blood was pissing out of his head. The referee bump was needed, I guess, but the match would have been better served as no disqualification, allowing them to go all out with the weapons, instead of sticking to punching. The ending was weak � there was no need for Bradshaw to bring the chair into the ring at all, and Eddie didn�t seem to have been pushed to his limits, not enough to finally snap and throw the match away. The non-decisive finish seems to be leading to a rematch at the Great American Bash. Yawn.
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